Some thoughts on love relationships

Feb 23, 2012 | Views: 29,908
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Never make promises then you break them with your spouse. It is the best way to destroy something good. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

The best way to love someone is to be the best you can be. In all relationships, being the best can only boost your partner’s trust in you. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

Love is a word used lightly sometimes. Love must entail loyalty, compassion, genuine care, sharing and honesty. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

In all relationships, honesty is most important. If you are honest, your relationship will grow stronger and better with time. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

What you get out of a relationship is what you put into it. You want it to be positive then treat your partner with respect, loyalty, honesty and good communications. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

It takes a years to earn the trust of your spouse, but one selfish mistake to break their heart. Then years to regain their trust again. Just be honest from the beginning and always be loyal. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

There is so much samsara out there, why bring more samsara into your relationship with your partner. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

Everyone has so much pain already. No one is not damaged goods. So why bring more pain to your partner. Love, cherish and respect your partner by being honest and always communicating. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

I am sorry is ok once, twice but not three times. If you are always apologizing, maybe you are not respecting the relationship you are in. Either respect your relationship or create a prison. It’s up to you. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

Love is intentional. So are affairs out of marriage. You choose what you want. But remember, whatever you choose will come back to you if you are choosing for selfish reasons. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

No one forced you to have a relationship. So do not make excuses for hurting your partner. Take responsibility for all your actions starting with your partner. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

When you can’t keep a relationship and it always ends after a while. That is your subconscious saying you really don’t want a relationship but you are using this as perhaps an excuse to avoid some bigger issues. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

All things are avoidable, it’s how selfish we are not to avoid it ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

When we look back and see how many partners we have changed, we can be sure it is a sign we have not fulfilled what we should be doing in life. Finding partners is just a delay tactic perhaps for what we should really be doing. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

Partners and spouses are only ok to have when we are ok. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

Sometimes deep seeded insecurities manifest in us not being able to keep a relationship and we keep changing them. We should work on ourselves instead of finding more partners to hurt. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

The best way to hurt yourself and your partner is when you use them to hide behind your selfish avoidances. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

When you are comfortable with yourself and you can be by yourself, that is when you know you are ready for a real relationship. It’s not about the other person, it’s about how you have accepted yourself first. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

If you hurt your partner in anyway and blame it on a outside reason, it is a clear indication you are covering your deep selfishness. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

You deserve what you give. The universe owes you nothing. But you owe the universe everything. Be comfortable with that thought first and then seek friends. ~Tsem Rinpoche

 

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49 Responses to Some thoughts on love relationships

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  1. Louisa on Jan 14, 2014 at 8:08 pm

    I’m always learning and practising loving people around me unconditionally. Although I did not love my parents the way they expect, i still love them but they can never get enough. Just because I dont love them the way they want and they thought I dont love them. I really upset and dont know what more I can do.

  2. Carmen Lin @ KMP on Sep 23, 2013 at 9:37 pm

    Thank you Rinpoche for sharing your thoughts, with folded hands. What Rinpoche said is very truth and applicable to anyone of all walks of life. I will read it again and again when friends of mine had relationship problem or I myself having the problem, I can know where to find the solution and words of advice. Thank you again Rinpoche, for your efforts to enhance the lives of others.

  3. […] is intentional. So are affairs out of marriage. You choose what you want. But remember, whatever you choose will come back to you if you are choosing for […]

  4. Joy on Feb 14, 2013 at 11:15 pm

    When you are comfortable with yourself and you can be by yourself, that is when you know you are ready for a real relationship. It’s not about the other person, it’s about how you have accepted yourself first. ~ Tsem Rinpoche

    I like this quote the best… it is really true… most of us get in to a relationship for all the wrong reasons. They think life is like some Hollywood fantasy and they go chasing after this idealistic dream which in the end hurts us more than anything else when it does not fit our projections and expectations. And when get in to a relationship we tend to forget ourselves and our whole life revolves around that person, we do whatever that person wants, wishes, and sometimes we even allow ourselves to be use and abuse… all in the name of love. And we become dependent of this person like a puppet. I have seen this in so many of my friends… is it really love? Or is it because of our own insecurities and selfish reasons?

    Being true and comfortable with yourself, knowing who you are, where you stand and dealing with your own self first is far better because then when we do enter a relationship, we compliment the other instead of epecting, we give, instead of depending, we’re interdependent and it is a mutual, two way street kind of thing, where both can grow individually and together… especially if both partners were doing spirit Dharma practice together… it becomes a blessing to one another instead of an obstacle. A couple like this is a big inspiration… http://blog.tsemtulku.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/inspiration-worthy-words/for-couples.html

  5. Paris on Feb 14, 2013 at 6:06 pm

    Rereading this again this Valentines’ day and thinking about how, at the heart of everything, is this real gritty honesty that we all need to look at, in every of our relationships. Once the razzle dazzle of moonlight, flowers and chocolates dies down, we are left ourselves to ourselves – then what?

    Then we start creating problems, either for ourselves, our parents, or both. The relationship itself doesn’t go wrong; nor is it our partner’s fault when things don’t peter out the way we want it to. At the end of the day, we have to remember that it takes two hands to clap and to ask ourselves what it is that *I* am doing right or wrong?

    Remember too, whenever things are tough, of the good times, the positive stuff and why it is we fell in love in the first place. Good always wins over the evil and yes, I do still believe that love can make the world go round, if only we stick with it.

  6. Paris on Feb 3, 2013 at 11:36 pm

    To add to this, Rinpoche gave a wonderful teaching on how to maintain a successful relationship at one of his students’ wedding a few years ago. I remember it being an especially beautiful teaching because the girl was Buddhist but the boy was Christian – and the advice given was just as relevant for both. Relive the teaching here! (it comes in three parts) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YO9yjD_j5HI

    David Lai has also written a book about relationships based on these teachings – a very cute way of presenting different thoughts on relationships, but with this same underlying message that Rinpoche gives us. Here! “Conversations in Love”: http://www.kechara.com/publications/publications/mind-body-spirit/conversations-in-love/

  7. Jessica Yap on Dec 7, 2012 at 4:52 pm

    Everything begins with me, myself, and I. How i feel, how i react to situations, how i treat others, everything is from me. These quotes should be read every now and then to contemplate on..

    Thank you for the profound quotes, Rinpoche!

  8. mitra on Jun 13, 2012 at 10:53 am

    good advice for every one.

  9. Wan Wai Meng on Mar 23, 2012 at 11:36 am

    These are really thought provoking thoughts about relationships. Thank you sharing them, such quotes will really help people think about what they are doing.

  10. su_zan on Mar 6, 2012 at 5:20 pm

    Dear Rinpche thank you for all the above quotes. It reminds me of the talk you give during my wedding day.

    For me the above quotes not only apply on a couple relationship, it applies to all kinds of relationships (friends, teachers, family, children and etc)

    One of which is
    “Never make promises then you break them with your spouse. It is the best way to destroy something good. Tsem Rinpoche”

  11. Melinda yap on Mar 1, 2012 at 7:14 pm

    Dear Rinpoche,
    Thank you for your thoughts and advice on love and relationships. It is so so true what Rinpoche has shared. After reading, I looked back and pondered about my past relationships… It is true in order for a relationship to be in harmony,both parties should be honest plus have respect for each other from the beginning of the relationship. This will in time gives security and stability to the relationship…I love all the above thoughts by Rinpoche on love & relationships…I’ll save it so I could remind myself what love and relationship is all about! 😉

  12. Albert Ratchaga on Feb 29, 2012 at 9:50 pm

    Dear Rinpoche,

    Thank you for the quotes, some times we can be very possessive when we love someone, either to our partner or family, we tend to be very controlling, and the reason of being like this is just because “I LOVE YOU”.

    just a simple word I Love You, it became a manifestation of our selfishness, instead of accepting the person we love, we tend to turn them into our ideally person to be. we expect everything from them but giving nothing from ourselves… so are we really loving them or we actually loves ourselves more? Is love a taking or giving?

  13. Julia Tan on Feb 29, 2012 at 3:05 am

    “All things are avoidable, it’s how selfish we are not to avoid it”

    Something as simple as saying NO and we can avoid hurting ourselves and our partners. We didn’t do it. We let it be.

    If you truly love your partners, do something about it, before it is too late..

  14. Uncle Lai on Feb 25, 2012 at 11:56 pm

    Thank you once again Rinpoche for all the wonderful quotes on love and relationships. You are the most caring person, always look into us and find ways to explain and teach how to live a happier life.

    Of all the quotes I like this the most. ‘In all relationships honesty is most important. If you are honest, your relationship will grow stronger and better with time.’ I fully agree with that because if we are honest we will not cheat, we dont lie, we trust and we are humble. I think this is so because it comes from inside us,

  15. patsy on Feb 25, 2012 at 11:55 pm

    Thank you, Rinpoche, for sharing these useful quotes which we can use not only in relationships but with every one whether its friends relationship or love relationship. When we care for others and treat them well with respect, we will get the results of being treated well by others too.

    I like this one, “What you get out of a relationship is what you put into it. You want it to be positive then treat your partner with respect, loyalty, honesty and good communications.”

  16. Li Kheng on Feb 25, 2012 at 3:29 pm

    Thank you Rinpoche for this insightful post on relationships. We spend so much time chasing after prince/princess charming whom we believe will make our world a better place. We often forget to consider using ourselves to make someone else’s world a better place. Thank you Rinpoche for this reminder. I especially like this quote:

    “There is so much samsara out there, why bring more samsara into your relationship with your partner. Tsem Rinpoche”

  17. Amala Sheilagh Mercer on Feb 25, 2012 at 2:54 pm

    Thank you , this is something , Dear Tsem Rinpoche, I will print put and read often ,I may also share it often to anyone open to reading it. And a copy in my washsroom, never know who reads the only reading matterial available to them there, I truly, realize and not all that long ago, that, there is an emotional love and then there is unconditional love,. That is a start , I believe, even though, this only scratches the surface, because of an out of body experience, it was difficult to fathom that much love . Yet changed my life. Now this here to read and remind me. .
    Love and Blessings
    Amala Sheilagh

  18. vc on Feb 25, 2012 at 1:03 pm

    Dear All,
    All of your opinions about relationship maybe right or wrong.But all you haven’t got there yet.To get out of six defiling objects from your mind.All of you are subjected to six dusts defiling senses which all of you are attracted to such as beauty,intelligent,smell,senses.Be honest to yourself and speak the truth.Don’t go and claim yourself you are the GOD and not attracted to anything and swear and curse others when you are now wearing the ‘Human Body’. If you think don’t like this world you can always calm your mind and return to the source,the Origin and achieve perfect enlightenment like the Buddha.If you think you like what you are doing,just go with the flow and don’t complain.

  19. Li Kim on Feb 25, 2012 at 5:23 am

    These quotes are true and real. Not the usual mambo jumbo you get in books and cards. Many of the quotes from Rinpoche brought back the sweet and fond memories of relationships for me. I am not bitter la but can say that I have become slightly disenchanted. I think that I will just enjoy the quotes and not think too much into relationships.

    “When you can’t keep a relationship and it always ends after a while. That is your subconscious saying you really don’t want a relationship but you are using this as perhaps an excuse to avoid some bigger issues.” – this applies to many I must say…

  20. Datuk May on Feb 24, 2012 at 4:54 pm

    The quote I like best is “Love is a word used lightly sometimes. Love must entail loyalty, compassion, genuine care, sharing and honesty”. I totally agree with this and in my own view love is not confined to couples and family only but rather it is universal and to be practised unconditionally.

    Love is tough to give as it challenges our selfishness, ego etc etc that concocts most negative emotions in most people. Being as delusional as we are, we think we are in bliss when there is love.

    I totally disagree that Rinpoche is not an expert in relationships and love, if the above quote is what attracts me then it is true for me that Rinpoche is the only one person I know that truly gives love to every sentient being.

    Now that is tough to practise.

  21. Jean Ai on Feb 24, 2012 at 2:36 pm

    After reading this, putting it alongside the video Rinpoche sent to us (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YLH6-P6rIv8), I gotta add to this post – never choose someone on the basis of their looks! It all fades with age, no matter how rich, poor, fat or skinny you are! And death comes to everyone, so how do you want to live your relationship? With anger, disharmony and bitterness, or do you want your relationship to be the cause of something bigger and better? Rinpoche always says some relationships drag people down, and others lead to better things…if yours is the former, time to stop being selfish and let go, both for your benefit and for your partner’s!

  22. vc on Feb 24, 2012 at 1:29 pm

    Rinpoche is very lucky to have get out of samsara and not involve in opposite sex relationships.Everyone should think they are indeed lucky and have the privilege to left the home life and seek the Way.We can only see what is worldly and not transcendental.This life is not just about humanity but transcendental to the ultimate reality.Nirvana.

  23. Wee Liang on Feb 24, 2012 at 4:43 am

    Dear Rinpoche,

    Thank you so much for the dharma talk last night. Also thank you very much for all the quotes on love and relationships. Its very enlightening, makes me reflect. My favourite quote is ‘The best way to love someone is to be the best you can be. In all relationships, being the best can only boost your partner’s trust in you.’ This one is harddddddd.

    Wee Liang

  24. Any Loke on Feb 23, 2012 at 11:53 pm

    Wow, is so true about what Rinpoche wrote. But, human is really selfish, sometimes, we never think that the problem of the relationship is actually created by oursleves. After all the teachings and Puja that I have done it really helped so much in all aspects.

  25. bengkooi on Feb 23, 2012 at 11:46 pm

    Thank you Rinpoche for sharing these thought provoking quotes. My favourite is “Love is a word used lightly sometimes. Love must entail loyalty, compassion, genuine care, sharing and honesty.”

    To share with those who have not had the fortune to hear one of Rinpoche’s talks about relationships… As Rinpoche has said many times, a dharma relationship is different from a secular relationship because we are not in it just for ourselves. When we enter a dharma relationship, we must be determined to make it last. We must be determined to make it work regardless of whatever problems come along. We cannot just try things out because we may hurt the other person and that is a big no no.

    Its good to be aware of these things, because there are people who jump into relationships or even dharma relationships unaware of what it really entails and the commitment that we must put in.

    Bottom line – dont hurt others.
    Bottom bottom line: be a monk/nun!

  26. Khoo HH on Feb 23, 2012 at 10:13 pm

    Thanks Rinpoche for the sharing on love relationships.
    “If you hurt your partner in anyway and blame it on a outside reason, it is a clear indication you are covering your deep selfishness”
    How can we hurt a person if we truly love that person, and we know that the person also love us. I think “Selfishness” is the only explaination on this. A lot of time we are treating our partner good because we wanted to feel good, not because we want our partner to feel good. I have heard of this situation a lot of times from people around me. A guy wanted to bring his girlfriend for a nice dinner because he wanted to make his girlfriend happy. But he got angry with his girlfriend when she took a long time to makeup. Suppose to be a romantic dinner, ended up with a quarrel in the house. I will always think, what is the objective of this dinner? To not miss the reserved table, or to make your partner happy? Perhaps he thought that his effort of booking the table is greater than his partner. I think if a couple truly love each other, even a roadside stall will be a romantic dinner.

  27. SEreNa on Feb 23, 2012 at 7:44 pm

    Thanks for Rinpoche sharing on some thoughts for love and relationships.

    We must always remember to share and communicate with our love partner for every challenges we face in life. You have make your choice to spend the rest of your life with the loved one. SO, Be responsible and respect to the loved one. Don’t be selfish as pain will arise to the loved one including youself.

  28. CPD- Centro de Patologia do Desenvolvimento on Feb 23, 2012 at 5:02 pm

    And it takes no time to fall in love
    But it takes you years to know what love is….

  29. CPD- Centro de Patologia do Desenvolvimento on Feb 23, 2012 at 5:01 pm

    “And it takes no time to fall in love
    But it takes you years to know what love is”

  30. Uncle Eddie on Feb 23, 2012 at 4:09 pm

    Is love all we need to make a successful and fulfilling life relationship? Obviously, not all love relationships are the “Life Partnership kind”. It is important to realise and recognise that, and be okay with that. We can learn so much from the experiences of past relationships, to change towards the better, to a more adaptable, improved and acceptable one for both partners. It is everyone’s goal to have the desire of finding a life partner who caters to one’s entire needs and satisfaction. We all want someone who looks good, always make us laugh, supports us, respect us and trusts us well. Before we can find that ‘someone’, we need to be that person – that includes accepting all faults and short comings of oneself and that of your life partner too. A healthy relationship, essentially, should have a good building up of respect, loyalty, trust and a good admiration for each other; more similar to a house solid basic foundation structure, where the more love and nurturance we put into it, is what makes it a happy home, and a successful and fulfilling life relationship in the years to come.

  31. Ash Ng on Feb 23, 2012 at 2:56 pm

    Dear Rinpoche, You have given us some wonderful insights on having relationships with others. I especially agree with the few advises below;

    1) When you are comfortable with yourself and you can be by yourself, that is when you know you are ready for a real relationship. It’s not about the other person, it’s about how you have accepted yourself first.

    2) Sometimes deep seeded insecurities manifest in us not being able to keep a relationship and we keep changing them. We should work on ourselves instead of finding more partners to hurt.

    I feel these 2 major points encompass all the others and when we are REALLY ready after dealing with our deep seeded insecurities, comfortable and accepting ourselves then only we take the next step. Appreciate Your enlightening insights and You care for us with others. Will put in effort working on these as the essence of Dharma is compassion towards others and not hurting or harming them would be the first priority. Thus, working on oneself first is the key to happiness. Tashi delek

  32. Yvonne Yap on Feb 23, 2012 at 2:48 pm

    Thank you Rinpoche! this is a reminder , remind the things we know, but we always forgot.Because you care.

  33. abby on Feb 23, 2012 at 2:15 pm

    Love and compassion is the greatest lesson in everyone’s life.
    Yes, Rinpoche may not be the expert, but yes, Rinpoche do care about everyone. And with this compassion, Rinpoche is the Love Guru 🙂

  34. tenzin llhamo on Feb 23, 2012 at 1:46 pm

    This is the one I like the most. Because of being dishonest, so many relationships are destroyed. How sad! But now that we understand, we must be better. Treat relationships with respect, humility and honesty.

    ‘In all relationships, honesty is most important. If you are honest, your relationship will grow stronger and better with time’

  35. Margaretlee on Feb 23, 2012 at 1:42 pm

    Thank you Rinpoche for sharing your thoughts and experiences you have encountered with the many stories you were told.

    I think responsibility, honesty, sincerity and intergrity apply to everything we do in our life, be it work or relationship.

    There is a saying that people only starts to know themselves when they are in a relationship, it is indeed true when we realise we always demand this and that from our partner and never gives back, a state of complete self absorption. relationship is about giving and not taking.

    I paticularly like this quote from Rinpoche : “When you are comfortable with yourself and you can be by yourself, that is when you know you are ready for a real relationship. It’s not about the other person, it’s about how you have accepted yourself first. Tsem Rinpoche”

    Going to share this blog with many of my samsara friends…..

  36. yekyee on Feb 23, 2012 at 1:10 pm

    Each of Rinpoche is very logic and make sense. When we choose a relationship, must always our partner with real care and patient. No one is perfect. How can we go along with each other, tolerance is another good deed we need practice. I believe very strongly on it. My aunty friend always with me, it is not easy for two different character person live, eat, play, work together, need so much efforts and patient. I agreed. Thankyou for Rinpoche sharing.

  37. shivani on Feb 23, 2012 at 1:08 pm

    I want to know a little about Karmic Connection.We meet people but they leave us yet we cannot earse them

  38. Jace Chong on Feb 23, 2012 at 12:59 pm

    Thanks Rinpoche for sharing these very useful quotes.

    Relationship used to be something very hard for me to juggle in between love and selfishness. When I had quarrel with partner, I always not sure this is because I want him to be my way, or I want my partner to improve. And the definition of improvement is vary to different people.

    “What you get out of a relationship is what you put into it. You want it to be positive then treat your partner with respect, loyalty, honesty and good communications. ”

    This is a very practical way. I should not focus on what I want, but what is best for our partner.

    Even Rinpoche didn’t go through all these, Rinpoche understand better than everyone else what should we practice in relationship. Salute to Rinpoche, as always!

  39. Han Siew Fong on Feb 23, 2012 at 12:14 pm

    All the advices will sink into my mind. .. and have a better relationship with my partner

    “If you hurt your partner in anyway and blame it on a outside reason, it is a clear indication you are covering your deep selfishness.” Tsem Rinpoche

    i contemplated on the above and i do realize the meaning of the quote.

    Thank you Rinpoche for this wonderful post

  40. Nicholas on Feb 23, 2012 at 11:13 am

    Thanks for Rinpoche advice.

    Found that the teaching is not just for relationship but it is also applicable for anything we do in our life.

    It’s all about care. How much we want to do for others is how much we cares for others.
    We responsible for the relationship because no one can force us. We are the one choose to be and should go all the way. I like this! No point to regret on what we have not done to save the relationship because we can always be the one to take action first.

    It’s not about who love whom more than who suppose to take the first move, it’s how much you love, how much you appreciate and how far you want to go with your relationship.

    This is just applicable for everything in our life.

  41. kenny wong on Feb 23, 2012 at 11:10 am

    Dear Rinpoche,

    Again, thank you for you kind insights. We choose our partners ourselves and have to accept him/her for who she is. The good, the bad, the ugly and the whole. How we percieve and accept our patners is totally up to us, thus we control our own happiness in the relationship. But if we are not generous and cannot lose out in the relationship and must win all the time, we will definately be the one losing at the end…. being unhappy, unfulfilled and bitter.

    Your words of advice are so true and spot on Rinpoche.

  42. skyong on Feb 23, 2012 at 10:37 am

    Dear Rinpoche, thank you very much for the good advises.

    “Be prepared to have huge disappointment if you expect your partner to act or be perfect in this way or that way while you put the same expectation on yourself.”

    “Trying to put away, hiding, or avoiding relationship issues won’t make them go away. You need to talk over or be clear about it.”

    “Always bringing up and rehashing previous issues mean the issue doesn’t solve go away or it just mean you’re not letting go and keep holding on to it.”

    • skyong on Feb 23, 2012 at 10:45 am

      Correction:
      “Be prepared to have huge disappointment if you expect your partner to act or be perfect in this way or that way while you put the _different_ expectation on yourself.”

  43. Hui Keng on Feb 23, 2012 at 10:35 am

    LOVE is in the air. Read on baby…How lucky Rinpoche giving advice around the clock! Rinpoche’s love is genuinely unconditional hence it survives all tests and challenges. We are pretty much lucky to have Rinpoche. We have sowed good seeds for this to happen and we must utilise fully given this opportunity. Rinpoche immensely love all of us, even more deeply than what our parents can do.

  44. Irene on Feb 23, 2012 at 10:22 am

    But what about a situation in which one partner dominates the whole family, and always expects to be bowed and scraped to. He always complains about how nobody does anything right (like he wants), and threatens to leave if we don’t shape up. I often wonder how much of this is due to his family background. (He grew up in an abusive environment.)

    Don’t get me wrong–he can be charming and generous when he wants to be, but sometimes I think he does it in order to manipulate people. (When we do what he wants, he praises them or gives them little gifts, otherwise he criticizes and sulks.) If things get too quiet, then he’s good at manufacturing drama (like claiming to have a mortal illness), and he just loves to gossip. But he doesn’t think that HE is doing any of this, according to him he’s just humbly following what is right (as he was taught). And somehow he always ends up being the center of attention.

    I’m probably making him sound like a monster, but that’s not right. He can be loyal and compassionate (he loves animals, and gives to charity) and is obviously very hard working and a very good manager. He has the potential to make a positive impact on the world. But we’re in this lopsided relationship with him, in which he gets to set all the conditions, and anyone who can’t accept that can just leave. (He’s alienated a lot of people over the years, although he tells it a different way–who knows what the truth is.) Anyway, Rinpoche, I’m sure you know people like that. What to do…?

    • mrs cheung on Feb 23, 2012 at 8:12 pm

      dear rinpoche, i also know someone similar to what irene has written here in her reply, plus more. he also flirts with younger women but his sick and old wife could do nothing to stop him. facing such a monster, she could only soar and sob over her misfortune. uneducated, unemployed, unwanted, old and sick. she has no where to run to. what to do…?

  45. freon on Feb 23, 2012 at 10:06 am

    With folded hand, Thank you Guru

  46. tsemtulku on Feb 23, 2012 at 9:46 am

    Some thoughts on love and relationships..I am not the expert, but over the years I have to listen to alot of people and I came out with some of my own conclusions…

    • Sophia chung on Feb 23, 2012 at 11:19 am

      Dear Rinpoche,

      Thank you for your advice on relationship. It made me reflect on myself to improve tremendously..
      It was great pleasure to meet u in the gompa last nite. I feel very lucky to receive
      a dharma talk in person from you. Although shocking, It was priceless, the love and effort you put in for
      Your students. Thank you for taking the time to pay us the visit.

      Sophia

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UPCOMING TOPICS FOR DECEMBER / 十二月份讨论主题

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KECHARA FOREST RETREAT PROGRESS UPDATES

Here is the latest news and pictorial updates, as it happens, of our upcoming forest retreat project.

The Kechara Forest Retreat is a unique holistic retreat centre focused on the total wellness of body, mind and spirit. This is a place where families and individuals will find peace, nourishment and inspiration in a natural forest environment. At Kechara Forest Retreat, we are committed to give back to society through instilling the next generation with universal positive values such as kindness and compassion.

For more information, please read here (english), here (chinese), or the official site: retreat.kechara.com.

Noticeboard

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  • Lin Mun
    Wednesday, Dec 7. 2016 10:05 PM
    Thank you Dato’ Colin for sharing your journey in dharma and your method in applying dharma in a corporate world.

    I always think that it is difficult to practise dharma in corporate as everyone only have the same mindset that is to gain more profit at the fastest pace and therefore lots of greed and selfishness. But you have showed us that as long as we are perseverance and hold our principal and dharma strongly, we can apply it no matter which segment we are, be it corporate or not.

    Most importantly, is to set the right mindset and hold on to dharma principles. Continue to strive no matter how many challenges we have.

    http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/guest-contributors/how-to-grow-your-business-with-buddhist-principles.html
  • Lin Mun
    Wednesday, Dec 7. 2016 09:54 PM
    Thank you Pastor Patsy for sharing your dharma journey. It is a great encouragement for many as you show that determination will surely bring result.

    It is important to practise dharma and to always focus out. When we keep practising this our mind will slowly transform to benefit others instead of feeding ourselves with all the greed, anger and selfishness.

    http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/students-friends/how-dharma-changed-my-life.html
  • Stella Cheang
    Wednesday, Dec 7. 2016 01:13 PM
    So happy to see the YAK – Millennials of Kechara – were learning to become an entrepreneur, be proactive and independent with good motivations. These practical experience will lay the foundation for leadership qualities, lateral thinking as well as a creative and innovative mindset. I wish to see more success for our Kechara YAK and looking forward to their upcoming activities! Thank you Rinpoche for this sharing.

    http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/students-friends/yak.html
  • Samfoonheei
    Tuesday, Dec 6. 2016 10:22 PM
    Good sharing and informative blogs of Kuan Yin temples in Malaysia.
    Origins of Kuan Yin been explained too. I do not know so much about it till i read these post…i only knew Kuan Yin as Goddess of Mercy.When i was young i used to follow my mother to temple to pray without knowing much..just as one one of a deity.On Guan Yin’s birthday, devotees observe a vegetarian diet in remembrance of her compassion and kindness.
    Thank you Rinpoche for sharing these beautiful post .
    http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/art-architecture/guan-yin-day.html
  • Alice Tay
    Tuesday, Dec 6. 2016 09:16 PM
    This is very auspicious that 2 great masters meet together and talk about dharma works for the benefit of all sentient beings.

    I am humble to see our precious guru to pay respect and prostrate to his friend, H.E. Kyabje Yongyal Rinpoche , who is a very learned scholar, master of tantra, always focused his time on teaching hundreds of students in Sera and in in-depth personal practice. This is a good example for us to follow and practice.

    Thank you Rinpoche for this wonderful sharing attached with the beautiful photos.

    http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/great-lamas-masters/meeting-kyabje-yongyal-rinpoche-in-new-york.html
  • Samfoonheei
    Tuesday, Dec 6. 2016 07:04 PM
    Very informative blog post that remind us.
    As human consume fish ,prawns and so forth from the sea laced with harmful chemical, toxins build up that lead to health problems in long term.Sad to know environment is so bad when some people do not care much about it.Sooner or later our oceans will be filled with rubbish,plastic if we are not doing enough to protect the environment.The plastic accounts for 15 per cent of the chick’s body weight…that is shocking.
    I do hope more people are aware of the truth behind the crisis destroying our seas.
    Thank you Rinpoche its a good sharing.
    http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/current-affairs/how-plastic-destroys-our-seas.html
  • Stella Cheang
    Tuesday, Dec 6. 2016 06:11 PM
    It is both motivating and enriching to read sharing by successful individual who applied Dharma in their life. Thank you Dato’ Colin for this sharing. This shows us that when we applied Buddha Dharma, we will be able to achieve more in life.

    http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/guest-contributors/how-to-grow-your-business-with-buddhist-principles.html
  • Stella Cheang
    Tuesday, Dec 6. 2016 04:00 PM
    This is the first time I read about Hecate in details. She is the goddess of magic, witchcraft, the night, moon, ghosts and necromancy, and sorcery. Yet people worship her. She was one of the main deities worshiped in Athenian households as a protective goddess and one who bestowed prosperity and daily blessings on the family. I find this juxtaposition very interesting on two level. How people will readily submit themselves to a powerful being bestowed with supernatural powers.

    On the other hand, Hecate, who is associated with dark powers are being worshipped as a protective goddess could mean she uses her power for doing good that benefits people. This goes to show that some who possesses dark power like witchcraft, necromancy and sorcery are not necessary bad and will not necessary harm. It all depends on their motivation.

    Thank you very much Rinpoche for this insightful article on Hecate.

    http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/etc/hecate.html
  • Samfoonheei
    Monday, Dec 5. 2016 03:58 PM
    Malaysia is so rich in its cultural identity, and the Dragon festival is one of them been celebrated in a way whereby different races too join in.It is wonderful to know,the origins of the Dragon Boat Festival and the story behind.It has now turned to a team-focused sport.which promotes discipline, racial harmony, physical fitness and mental toughness
    Thank you Rinpoche for sharing these very informative and interesting post.
    http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/current-affairs/the-dragon-boat-festival-a-fusion-of-traditional-and-modern-culture.html
  • Samfoonheei
    Monday, Dec 5. 2016 03:29 PM
    After reading these blog i learned something new.The word Chaplain.
    I have not come across of it before.
    Thanks Beatrix Ooi for sharing ..an interesting blog of how this young man served as a Buddhist Chaplains in the US Arm. There is only one Buddhist chapel in the United States military. In recent years there has been a growing number of Buddhists in the US military, hence the work of Buddhist chaplains are growing too. A great way to spread Dharma to more people in the military.
    Thank you again Beatrix Ooi
    http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/current-affairs/buddhist-chaplains-in-the-us-army.html
  • Lin Mun
    Sunday, Dec 4. 2016 05:07 PM
    Thank you Rinpoche for sharing the article on Dayak Festival and its community and cultures. It is very interesting to learn about the other races cultures. We in Malaysia are so fortunate that we are expose to so many differences and yet live harmoniously.

    http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/travel/gawai-dayak-the-celebration-of-bountiful-harvest.html
  • Yeo Kwai Gin
    Saturday, Dec 3. 2016 05:22 PM
    Wow ! 恭喜Justin与香积厨对社会的付出 !法喜 !

    感恩仁波切的付出与教导, 让在马来西亚的街头露宿者和一班家境贫困的人们在艰辛的时候得到帮助。詹杜固仁波切创立的克切拉香积厨对社会的付出是值得赞扬, 香积厨不但发放食物给街头露宿者,还提供流动医院主要在最快的时间让受伤的露宿者得到治疗, 还有FoodBank专提供食物与支援给各地需要帮忙如天灾带来的食物缺乏, 还有Imbi路的香积厨中心,提供给街头露宿者全免费的食物和饮品,免费沐浴和清洗衣服,还帮忙他们寻找工作等等。让他们体谅到社会另外拥有一班人还在关心着他们。
    愿街头露宿者得到更舒适的生活, 实现他们目标前进,社会繁荣,那么每一个人都可以安居立业,不用再在街头露宿了 !

    欲了解更多克切拉香积厨,或想参与活动,请继续游览 :
    http://www.kechara.com/soup-kitchen/what-we-do/

    感恩合十
    YEO KWAI GIN

    http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/kechara-soup-kitchen-ksk/kechara-won-2-awards.html
  • Lin Mun
    Saturday, Dec 3. 2016 04:42 PM
    Congratulation to Justin as well as KSK team. A well deserved recognition. You have selflessly working for those in need. Our society need more people to help those living on the street.

    May you and KSK team continue to grow and benefit more people.

    http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/kechara-soup-kitchen-ksk/kechara-won-2-awards.html
  • Alice Tay
    Saturday, Dec 3. 2016 12:53 PM
    Thank you Rinpoche and the team’s effort to share these powerful qualities of Dorje Shugden in Mongolian language. Hope they are more people get to know Dorje Shugden, an emanation of Manjushri, and understand to practice Dorje Shugden will also have all the benefits related to Manjushri’s practice.

    Hope these powerful qualities of Dorje Shugden will come up with the words in other languages to benefit more people.

    http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/dorje-shugden/powerful-qualities-of-dorje-shugden-in-memes-mongolian.html
  • Alice Tay
    Saturday, Dec 3. 2016 12:49 PM
    Thank you Rinpoche and the team’s effort to share these powerful qualities of Dorje Shugden in Mongolian language. Hope they are more people get to know Dorje Shugden, an emanation of Manjushri, and understand to practice Dorje Shugden will also have all the benefits related to Manjushri’s practice.

    Hope these powerful qualities of Dorje Shugden will come up with the words in other languages to benefit more people.

    http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/dorje-shugden/powerful-qualities-of-dorje-shugden-in-memes-mongolian.html

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CREDITS

Concept: Tsem Rinpoche
Technical: Lew Kwan Leng, Justin Ripley, Yong Swee Keong
Design: Justin Ripley, Cynthia Lee
Content: Tsem Rinpoche, Justin Ripley, Pastor Shin Tan, Sarah Yap
Writer: Pastor Loh Seng Piow
Admin: Pastor Loh Seng Piow, Beng Kooi

I must thank my dharma blog team who are great assets to me, Kechara and growth of dharma in this wonderful region. I am honoured and thrilled to work with them. I really am. Maybe I don't say it enough to them, but I am saying it now. I APPRECIATE THESE GUYS VERY MUCH!

Tsem Rinpoche

What Am I Writing Now

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The Unknown

The Known and unknown are both feared,
Known is being comfortable and stagnant,
The unknown may be growth and opportunities,
One shall never know if one fears the unknown more than the known.
Who says the unknown would be worse than the known?
But then again, the unknown is sometimes worse than the known. In the end nothing is known unless we endeavour,
So go pursue all the way with the unknown,
because all unknown with familiarity becomes the known.
~Tsem Rinpoche

Photos On The Go

Click on the images to view the bigger version. And scroll down and click on "View All Photos" to view more images.
This huge Buddha in Korea is magnificent
1 week ago
This huge Buddha in Korea is magnificent
The very first oracle of Dorje Shugden in trance statue. I have commissioned this.
1 week ago
The very first oracle of Dorje Shugden in trance statue. I have commissioned this.
Such a old and ancient thangka painting of Dorje Shugden. He has been around in Tibet practiced for hundreds of years.
1 week ago
Such a old and ancient thangka painting of Dorje Shugden. He has been around in Tibet practiced for hundreds of years.
One of the "Four Exalted Brothers" Avalokiteshvara statues, Phagpa Wati of Kyirong, which is now with H.H. the Dalai Lama in Dharamsala.
2 weeks ago
One of the "Four Exalted Brothers" Avalokiteshvara statues, Phagpa Wati of Kyirong, which is now with H.H. the Dalai Lama in Dharamsala.
Kyabje Zemey, Kyabje Zong Rinpoche and Kyabje Pabongka Choktrul Rinpoche
2 weeks ago
Kyabje Zemey, Kyabje Zong Rinpoche and Kyabje Pabongka Choktrul Rinpoche
My Oser girl and Mumu boy are so adorable
3 weeks ago
My Oser girl and Mumu boy are so adorable
Wow this meditator in his cave in front of a painting of Yamantaka draped with a white khata of respect. He sits among bones to remind him of impermanence and our future. The bones inspire him strongly to let go of all attachments in this life and focus on dharma, meditation and liberation and he is doing so. Very beautiful and inspirational. Tsem Rinpoche
3 weeks ago
Wow this meditator in his cave in front of a painting of Yamantaka draped with a white khata of respect. He sits among bones to remind him of impermanence and our future. The bones inspire him strongly to let go of all attachments in this life and focus on dharma, meditation and liberation and he is doing so. Very beautiful and inspirational. Tsem Rinpoche
Tenzing Norgay found this in Nepal. Guess what it is?
1 month ago
Tenzing Norgay found this in Nepal. Guess what it is?
Sir Edmund Hillary
1 month ago
Sir Edmund Hillary
Halloween is my favorite holiday. Wild natural plants and flowers are my favorite offering. Buddha\'s teachings on meditation and Yidam practice bring the ultimate results and happiness. ~Tsem Rinpoche
1 month ago
Halloween is my favorite holiday. Wild natural plants and flowers are my favorite offering. Buddha's teachings on meditation and Yidam practice bring the ultimate results and happiness. ~Tsem Rinpoche
Previous lives do resemble current lives especially if they are a recognized incarnation. If notice how similar the previous and current Trijang Rinpoche looks. The eyes, bone structure, expression, long neck, thin and overall look. Beautiful. I\'ve seen this phenomena over and over in many Rinpoche incarnations. Especially when you compare them with pictures of previous and current lives at around the same ages. Something powerfully karmic about this. Tsem Rinpoche
2 months ago
Previous lives do resemble current lives especially if they are a recognized incarnation. If notice how similar the previous and current Trijang Rinpoche looks. The eyes, bone structure, expression, long neck, thin and overall look. Beautiful. I've seen this phenomena over and over in many Rinpoche incarnations. Especially when you compare them with pictures of previous and current lives at around the same ages. Something powerfully karmic about this. Tsem Rinpoche
It\'s nice to have monks visitors and resident monks in Kechara
2 months ago
It's nice to have monks visitors and resident monks in Kechara
                         Taken in Lake Champlain in Canada. A huge water monster...neat...
2 months ago
Taken in Lake Champlain in Canada. A huge water monster...neat...
Beautiful! His Holiness Kyabje Trijang Dorje Chang has always been good friends with His Holiness Karmapa. No wonder H.H. Karmapa never spoke against Dorje Shugden. Two reasons perhaps: One is he knows the qualities of Trijang Rinpoche who is a attained being. And Karmapa himself has clairvoyance to perceive the true nature of Dorje Shugden directly. I love to see great beings like this manifesting closeness. When I see, I just want to prostrate to them and thank them for sharing such good examples to someone like me. Praise to the ego-less mind! Tsem Rinpoche
2 months ago
Beautiful! His Holiness Kyabje Trijang Dorje Chang has always been good friends with His Holiness Karmapa. No wonder H.H. Karmapa never spoke against Dorje Shugden. Two reasons perhaps: One is he knows the qualities of Trijang Rinpoche who is a attained being. And Karmapa himself has clairvoyance to perceive the true nature of Dorje Shugden directly. I love to see great beings like this manifesting closeness. When I see, I just want to prostrate to them and thank them for sharing such good examples to someone like me. Praise to the ego-less mind! Tsem Rinpoche
Serkong Dorje Chang on the left and his son Serkong Tsenshab Rinpoche on the right.
2 months ago
Serkong Dorje Chang on the left and his son Serkong Tsenshab Rinpoche on the right.
High lamas in France September 2016
2 months ago
High lamas in France September 2016
༧གོང་ས་ཆེན་པོ་སྐུ་འཕྲེང་བཅུ་བཞི་པ་མཆོག་དང་རྡོ་རྗེ་ཤུགས་ལྡན། - Interesting relationship between 14th Dalai Lama and Dorje Shugden:   http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/?p=109757
2 months ago
༧གོང་ས་ཆེན་པོ་སྐུ་འཕྲེང་བཅུ་བཞི་པ་མཆོག་དང་རྡོ་རྗེ་ཤུགས་ལྡན། - Interesting relationship between 14th Dalai Lama and Dorje Shugden: http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/?p=109757
Dalai Lama Says We Can Practise Dorje Shugden Finally! Read more on this development--- http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/?p=109777
3 months ago
Dalai Lama Says We Can Practise Dorje Shugden Finally! Read more on this development--- http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/?p=109777
More time spent in dharma work is more karma collected to be happy and more time spent in non-dharma works is more karma collected to be unhappy.~Tsem Rinpoche
3 months ago
More time spent in dharma work is more karma collected to be happy and more time spent in non-dharma works is more karma collected to be unhappy.~Tsem Rinpoche
All Dorje Shugden prophesizes will come to pass,
 Those who generate refuge and merits will trust, 
 By trusting one will see the good results of his pronouncements,
 By seeing the good results, one\'s path becomes more clear, 
 The path of practice, purification and siddhic results, 
 This would eliminate the samsara within our minds.
 ~Tsem Rinpoche
3 months ago
All Dorje Shugden prophesizes will come to pass, Those who generate refuge and merits will trust, By trusting one will see the good results of his pronouncements, By seeing the good results, one's path becomes more clear, The path of practice, purification and siddhic results, This would eliminate the samsara within our minds. ~Tsem Rinpoche
Large Dorje Shugden statue built by the 5th Dalai Lama and housed in Trode Khangsar. Sock Wand and Mdm Chuah took this picture in Lhasa, Tibet 2016
3 months ago
Large Dorje Shugden statue built by the 5th Dalai Lama and housed in Trode Khangsar. Sock Wand and Mdm Chuah took this picture in Lhasa, Tibet 2016
Our own Kecharian Mdm. Chua with the oracle of Dorje Shugden Gen Tenzin Tsultrim in Lhasa, Tibet 2016
3 months ago
Our own Kecharian Mdm. Chua with the oracle of Dorje Shugden Gen Tenzin Tsultrim in Lhasa, Tibet 2016
Our very own Kecharian Mdm Chua standing in front of holy Trode Khangsar-the Chapel to Dorje Shugden built 400 years ago by the Great 5th Dalai Lama-Tibet 2016
3 months ago
Our very own Kecharian Mdm Chua standing in front of holy Trode Khangsar-the Chapel to Dorje Shugden built 400 years ago by the Great 5th Dalai Lama-Tibet 2016
Our very own Kecharian Mdm Chua standing in front of holy Gaden Monastery, Tibet 2016
3 months ago
Our very own Kecharian Mdm Chua standing in front of holy Gaden Monastery, Tibet 2016
                         This is the oracle of Dorje Shugden in Lhasa, Tibet. His name is Gen Tenzin Tsultrim of Sera Monastery in Tibet.
3 months ago
This is the oracle of Dorje Shugden in Lhasa, Tibet. His name is Gen Tenzin Tsultrim of Sera Monastery in Tibet.
Ms. Sock Wan, Oracle of Dorje Shugden in Tibet Gen Tenzin Tsultrim, Mdm Chuah and Mr. Tashi in Tibet 2016
3 months ago
Ms. Sock Wan, Oracle of Dorje Shugden in Tibet Gen Tenzin Tsultrim, Mdm Chuah and Mr. Tashi in Tibet 2016
Mahasiddha Kyabje Gangchen Rinpoche, H.H. Kyabje Trijang Rinpoche and Ven. Rabten Choktrul Rinpoche 2016
3 months ago
Mahasiddha Kyabje Gangchen Rinpoche, H.H. Kyabje Trijang Rinpoche and Ven. Rabten Choktrul Rinpoche 2016
His Eminence Mahasiddha Gangchen Rinpoche and the official oracle of Dorje Shugden Panglung Kuten Choji lah in Italy together September 2016
3 months ago
His Eminence Mahasiddha Gangchen Rinpoche and the official oracle of Dorje Shugden Panglung Kuten Choji lah in Italy together September 2016
My thoughts on Malaysia. Thank you. Tsem Rinpoche
3 months ago
My thoughts on Malaysia. Thank you. Tsem Rinpoche
Beautiful thangka of Vajra Yogini. Look at the details where she appears in visions and also takes people to Kechara.
3 months ago
Beautiful thangka of Vajra Yogini. Look at the details where she appears in visions and also takes people to Kechara.
Left to right:

His Holiness the Gaden Throne holder Jetsun Lungrik Namgyal, His Holiness Kyabje Zong Rinpoche (very young) and His Eminence Tsem Rinpoche in Gaden Shartse Prayer Hall during prayers.
3 months ago
Left to right: His Holiness the Gaden Throne holder Jetsun Lungrik Namgyal, His Holiness Kyabje Zong Rinpoche (very young) and His Eminence Tsem Rinpoche in Gaden Shartse Prayer Hall during prayers.
 It\'s nice when families support the spiritual journeys of their children. This is one beautiful family of Pastor Niral of Kechara
3 months ago
It's nice when families support the spiritual journeys of their children. This is one beautiful family of Pastor Niral of Kechara
Jog Falls a power place of Vajra Yogini and Heruka: http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/?p=108652
3 months ago
Jog Falls a power place of Vajra Yogini and Heruka: http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/?p=108652
Don\'t wait for the perfect group. Don\'t wait for the perfect person. Don\'t wait for the perfect situation. Don\'t expect yourself to be perfect. Don\'t even look for perfection at least in our realm as it does not exist or time will run out. Just get going and keep doing good. It\'s between you and yourself. Tsem Rinpoche
3 months ago
Don't wait for the perfect group. Don't wait for the perfect person. Don't wait for the perfect situation. Don't expect yourself to be perfect. Don't even look for perfection at least in our realm as it does not exist or time will run out. Just get going and keep doing good. It's between you and yourself. Tsem Rinpoche
Kind people are to be treasured. They make life worth living. ~Tsem Rinpoche
3 months ago
Kind people are to be treasured. They make life worth living. ~Tsem Rinpoche
Don\'t you love her bag? She\'s stylish and at one with the universe. OM Shanti. ~Tsem Rinpoche
3 months ago
Don't you love her bag? She's stylish and at one with the universe. OM Shanti. ~Tsem Rinpoche
Beautiful Manjushri carved in China
3 months ago
Beautiful Manjushri carved in China
Sent from Samsung tablet.
3 months ago
Sent from Samsung tablet.
We must loyal to our guru. How to be loyal? To always do the teachings and practice he gave us and to conquer our laziness. We must make our gurus more important than our ego. So it is important to always let our guru win and not our ego. If our ego wins, many will suffer and we will suffer. If our guru wins, temporarily we suffer, but long term we will be happy and many around us will be happy. You see, the guru is always on the look out to give us methods and teachings that we can engage in to bring us happiness. The biggest happiness is overcoming our ego and it\'s traces and the guru always directly and indirectly focuses on that. Our guru will always love and help us, but we must meet our guru half way too. Tsem Rinpoche
3 months ago
We must loyal to our guru. How to be loyal? To always do the teachings and practice he gave us and to conquer our laziness. We must make our gurus more important than our ego. So it is important to always let our guru win and not our ego. If our ego wins, many will suffer and we will suffer. If our guru wins, temporarily we suffer, but long term we will be happy and many around us will be happy. You see, the guru is always on the look out to give us methods and teachings that we can engage in to bring us happiness. The biggest happiness is overcoming our ego and it's traces and the guru always directly and indirectly focuses on that. Our guru will always love and help us, but we must meet our guru half way too. Tsem Rinpoche
Tsem Rinpoche with holy Mt Shasta of Northern California in the background: http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/?p=107430
3 months ago
Tsem Rinpoche with holy Mt Shasta of Northern California in the background: http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/?p=107430
We had a nice visit at Mt Shasta, a holy area in Northern California and did a good puja there: http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/?p=107430
3 months ago
We had a nice visit at Mt Shasta, a holy area in Northern California and did a good puja there: http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/?p=107430
I get requests from all around the world to do prayers. For certain individuals it\'s really dire, so I make special candle offerings to the Buddhas for them at my private residence. These are the candles that was offered recently for a very ill young little girl. Tsem Rinpoche
3 months ago
I get requests from all around the world to do prayers. For certain individuals it's really dire, so I make special candle offerings to the Buddhas for them at my private residence. These are the candles that was offered recently for a very ill young little girl. Tsem Rinpoche
This is powerful and true. When someone disappoints you so many times, it cannot be an accident anymore. You need to have compassion for them to not do more negative karma and not allow it anymore and we need need to have compassion for ourselves too and not let them hurt us again.. Tsem Rinpoche
3 months ago
This is powerful and true. When someone disappoints you so many times, it cannot be an accident anymore. You need to have compassion for them to not do more negative karma and not allow it anymore and we need need to have compassion for ourselves too and not let them hurt us again.. Tsem Rinpoche
Ra Lotsawa\'s personal sacred image of Yamantaka Vajrabhairava. Said to be housed in Samye Monastery, Tibet.
3 months ago
Ra Lotsawa's personal sacred image of Yamantaka Vajrabhairava. Said to be housed in Samye Monastery, Tibet.
Message from Tsem Rinpoche
3 months ago
Message from Tsem Rinpoche
This Tara has such a beautiful face...artwork on this is nice
3 months ago
This Tara has such a beautiful face...artwork on this is nice
This is the road that leads to my house in the mountains. I have a small house and a lake nearby the house and I live there on vegan foods with my pets-Mumu loves running around the meadows. I have a large outdoor Vajra Yogini statue made of stone and we make offerings of juniper leaves burned to her daily as sang. I love living in the mountains away from the senseless repeating of actions in urban life. Urban life with its various pollutions do not connect us to who we are inside. I love this walking path to my retreat home where I will live for the rest of my life and on the way home, I pluck some flowers for my shrine to offer to the Buddha...thank you for allowing me to live here. Tsem Rinpoche
3 months ago
This is the road that leads to my house in the mountains. I have a small house and a lake nearby the house and I live there on vegan foods with my pets-Mumu loves running around the meadows. I have a large outdoor Vajra Yogini statue made of stone and we make offerings of juniper leaves burned to her daily as sang. I love living in the mountains away from the senseless repeating of actions in urban life. Urban life with its various pollutions do not connect us to who we are inside. I love this walking path to my retreat home where I will live for the rest of my life and on the way home, I pluck some flowers for my shrine to offer to the Buddha...thank you for allowing me to live here. Tsem Rinpoche
 Rinpoche\'s quote is on my mom\'s final resting place. It was chosen by my dad and at that time he said it is the best one for both of them. My dad would be interred next to her when his time comes in the distant future. Pastor David Lai
3 months ago
Rinpoche's quote is on my mom's final resting place. It was chosen by my dad and at that time he said it is the best one for both of them. My dad would be interred next to her when his time comes in the distant future. Pastor David Lai
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Videos On The Go

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    This was on FB and I came across it. His Holiness said in Tibetan institutions there is a lot of propitiating protector/oracles and this is not what Buddhism is about. So they are putting Nechung/Tema oracles within the video to say what is he talking about when he does it himself. This is confusing is the message to his people. TR
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ASK A PASTOR


Ask the Pastors

A section for you to clarify your Dharma questions with Kechara’s esteemed pastors.

Just post your name and your question below and one of our pastors will provide you with an answer.

Scroll down and click on "View All Questions" to view archived questions.

  • December 6, 2016 00:34
    Sipra asked: Dear Pastors, For past 5 month or so I have been suffering from fear and anxiety. It has become difficult to live my daily life. I am mother of young child. Please help me.
    pastor answered: Dear Sipra, I'm sorry to read that you are going through this fear and anxiety, and i can understand that it has been effecting your daily life. You should seek professional help as this fear and anxiety can worsen if you don't get help and can deteriorate fast. Coupled with this, but by no means an alternative, you can engage in the daily practice of Lama Tsongkhapa and Dorje Shugden, which you can find here: http://www.dorjeshugden.org/practice/diamond-path-a-daily-sadhana-of-dorje-shugden Lama Tsongkhapa's practice is very well-known to calm the mind from depression, fear and anxiety so will be very beneficial for your situation. When engaging in the practice, please concentrate and focus on the mantra of Lama Tsongkhapa. Dorje Shugden's practice on the other hand is very good for alleviating any obstacles we may be facing in life. Therefore, this may have to overcome the obstacles in life that are causing the fear and anxiety or even remove obstacles for professional help to be even more effective, so you can overcome your situation. The cause of this situation may be deeply rooted, therefore i would like to advise you to do both methods, find professional help and engage in the daily practice. Coupled together they have a better chance of solving your situation, than by themselves. I hope this helps. Thank you.
  • December 3, 2016 23:25
    Fluxor asked: I am in a relationship with someone. I want to leave her, so i can give more time for social work and considering monastic life and being ordained in the future. I want to break up and do it gently, but I know she will be very mad and angry with me. Is it okay to leave her without notice? I will make a letter and arrange time to talk few days later when she is more stable emotionally. I think, it will be calmer way. Or should I talk to her first before I leave? I know this way she can be very mad and might do some abusive acts right away. But people say I need to respect her with talking to her first. I'm confused. I want to do it in a gentle and loving way that I don't want to bring her more suffering. Warmest metta, Fluxor
    pastor answered: Dear Fluxor, This is something that is a very difficult thing to do. If you have thought about this carefully and thoroughly, then you should do what feels right. However we must remember that the other person in the relationship may be reliant on you in some way. That being said, we can also hurt another person if we are not open and truthful about the situation. Instead we should go about the situation in the best possible manner to minimise harm and also to not create negative karma in the process, which is all too common when breaking up with someone, and this leads to more suffering in the future. You know the person who you are in a relationship with the best, however the method which you have mentioned may not be the most appropriate course of action. Rather than doing this, you should sit down with your partner and talk about the situation in calmer manner. This is the better approach, if you want to do this. You do need to respect her as a person with her own feelings, and in order to do the right thing in this situation, you should do so face to face and calmly. Following the method that you described may cause even more pain. If you do it calmly, respecting and honouring her as someone who has their own feelings, you are doing your best given the situation. Please remember that you don’t have to take monastic ordination in order to practice the Buddhist path. In fact within Kechara, Tsem Rinpoche has even started the tradition of lay pastors, who are lay people that have dedicated their lives to the practice of Dharma and the service of others. If you change your mind for any reason, Rinpoche has given a very good teaching on transforming a relationship to make it successful. You can find the video teaching here: http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/students-friends/ingredients-for-a-successful-relationship.html. I hope this helps. Thank you.
  • December 2, 2016 09:44
    Tashi asked: Dear pastors, What are the mantras and sacred syllables of the 12 Tenma Goddesses? I'm trying to find one to the bodhisattva Dorje Yudronma and goddess Tahsi Tseringma. Who is Shiptak Gyene exactly and what is his mantra and purpose? Is simply putting "Namo" and then the name of the Buddha or bodhisattva work? Also, is there a mantra for pimples or near sightedness?
    pastor answered: Dear Tashi, As Dorje Yudronma and Tashi Tseringma are not enlightened protectors but worldly deities who have been subdued to protect the Dharma, their mantras and practices are not free available to all practitioners, according to the Gelug tradition (I am unsure if they are available freely in other traditions). Usually, to engage in these practices one must have first received empowerment into a yidam or meditational deity practice, after which one can request the spiritual teacher to teach the practice. The functions of these protectors are also embodied in other protectors who are enlightened, and whose practices are readily available. As embodiments of enlightened beings, they can also help along the spiritual path to enlightenment rather than just providing material needs and removing obstacles. These include the various emanations of Dorje Shugden, for example Shize Dorje Shugden who is excellent for pacifying diseases and lengthening one’s life, just like Tashi Tseringma and the Long Life Sisters. However as an emanation of Manjushri, Shize can also grant beneficial imprints and help to overcome the inner obstacles of negative emotions and habituations that we all face in life. Shiptak Gyene is a protector specific to the Gelugpa tradition. He was a layman who lived in Lhasa during the time of Lama Tsongkhapa. Whenever Lama Tsongkhapa would travel to Lhasa, Shiptak Gyene would be there, ready to serve Lama Tsongkhapa as best as he could and receive teachings on the Dharma. He was very devoted to Lama Tsongkhapa and arose a protector to help those with material needs if they are sincere pracitioners of the Dharma. As such, he holds a bowl of jewels to represent that he can aid pracitioners in this regard. You can see a picture of Shiptak Gyene here: http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/archive/deitypics/highres/Shiptak_Gyene.jpg. The word ‘namo’ means ‘I prostrate’, hence when you add the word before the name of a Buddha or bodhisattva, it basically means that you are prostrating to that being. While this has tremendous effect, as you are verbalising the prostration towards an enlightened being and therefore generating some merit, it does not have the same effect as a mantra. This is because a mantra itself in the essence of that particular being, in the form of sound. If you repeat that mantra over and over again, you bring the energies associated with that particular enlightened being into your life. For example if you recite the Medicine Buddha mantra, you bring healing energies into your life. But if you only add ‘namo’ to the beginning of their name, you are simply making prostration. It would be much more beneficial to recite the proper mantra for the particular enlightenment being you are propitiating. As for pimples, I have not come across a specific mantra for this in my own practice. However two very good mantras that you could recite are Black Manjushri or Hayagriva. These two deities are very well known for curing skin diseases of all types, and therefore may help in the situation. You can find out more about Black Manjushri practice here: http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/prayers-and-sadhanas/a-black-manjushri-sadhana-self-healing-meditation-and-exercises.html. The Hayagriva (a wrathful emanation of Chenresig) mantra is recited as: HRI PEMA DATRI HAYAGRIVA HULU HULU HUNG PHET. For nearsightedness, you can engage in the practice of Migchey Chrenrezig, which is an excellent practice for those with eye problems. You can find it here: http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/buddhas-dharma/blessing-eye-problems.html. I hope this helps. Thank you.
  • November 30, 2016 18:56
    Angela Yo asked: These past few months, I can't stop myself thinking about being ordained to be a nun. I don't know where to begin. I don't know if it suits me or not. But I really want to make this lifetime meaningful. Thank you.
    pastor answered: Dear Angela Yo, I rejoice to read that are thinking about become ordained as a nun. This is a very good aspiration to have and follows the example of the holy Buddha Shakyamuni. He showed us the way to make our life meaningful by becoming a Buddha to benefit others. If you have not already done so, you should join a Dharma centre and find a guru. By following the advice of a qualified guru, you can train yourself to hold the ordination vows in the future. Here at Kechara, those who have the aspiration to become members of the holy sangha, first become a Pastor, which is in between a lay practitioner and an ordained monk or nun. This way, we can train ourselves to understand and live by the vows before become ordained. As ordination is very special and holy, it is better that we are prepared before we take the vows. This way we can make the most use of holding the sacred vows on our spiritual journey to enlightenment. As you engage along this path, first you should study and understand the most basic of vows, which are the refuge vows. All other vows, whether ordination, bodhisattva or tantric vows are based on the refuge vows, and the keeping of these vows are the root cause of gaining enlightenment. In fact, all other vows are extensions of these vows. Therefore it is very important that we have a firm basis for our practice by understanding and living by these vows properly. As you progress on your practice, you can learn the teachings such as the 50 Verses of Guru Devotion, the Lam Rim and the Wheel of Sharp Weapons. All these teachings will aid you on the path to become an ordained nun in the future. If this is truly your wish, then during your daily practices you should make strong aspirational prayers that you are able to fulfil this. At the same time you should create the causes for this to occur. The way to do this is by supporting the sangha, you can do this by making any form of dana offering to them, from food, clothing, material assistance or anything else that they would need your help with. While doing this, you should generate the strong aspiration that you can become a member of the sangha. As the sangha are one of the Three Jewels, any offerings that you make to them, especially in terms of your time and effort, will generate a lot of merit because they are holding the holy vows. I hope this helps, and I make the prayer that your auspicious aspiration is fulfilled, that you make your life meaningful by holding the vows of an ordained nun. Thank you.
  • November 28, 2016 12:32
    Demian asked: Dear pastors, Just recently, I have read about concentrations and that has gotten me worried. If one worships a depiction of Saraswati without any concentrations of the depiction, does that mean that I've been praying to an empty shell? If so, does praying to Saraswati's depictions that are online work or not? Or could a simple visualization work without praying to a statue or thangka, but to a visualized form? Would the visualization in Jamyang Khyentse Chökyi Lodrö's praise to Saraswati be alright along with the mantra? Or does the visualization have to use this website's prayer and mantra to Saraswati? Do the 8 offerings have to be real or can they visualized instead? For the 8th offering of music, does there have to be a bell, or can a drum, flute, violin, or even vocal replace that? What are the views of the mantra "Nam Myoho Renge Khyo"?
    pastor answered: Dear Demian, Thank you for your question. Concentration during one’s daily prayers is an important factor. Within Buddhism, we believe that there are three ways in which a person interacts with the world, these are the body, speech and mind. In order to receive the full benefit of the practice you engage in, you should ensure that all three of these are used. For the body, this is by sitting down to engage in your daily practice without getting distracted. The best posture for this is the meditation position known as the seven-point Vairochana position, this is described in detail in the text Liberation in the Palm of Your Hand. For your speech, you engage in reciting the prayers and the mantra recitation. And for the mind, you concentrate in the various visualisations associated with the practice you are engaging in. Even though you have been praying without the use of concentration, it has still been effective since Saraswati is an enlightened being. She has full compassion, and will definitely bestow her energies and love to those who invoke upon her with a pure heart and good motivation. However, if you do concentrate on both your visualisation and the mantra recitation, the practice will be more effective and you will see a heightened improvement in your life. In regards to the visualisation of Saraswati according to the praise by Jamyang Khyentse Chokyi Lodro, this actually belongs to the practice of another lineage, therefore I cannot comment on its validity, as I don’t belong to the lineage to have studied its origins and how it differs from the praise presented here on Rinpoche’s blog. That being said, each lineage has its own version of the visualisation of deities, and this in inherently linked to the particular praise. Therefore if you were to recite one particular praise or practice, you should keep the visualisation to the one that corresponds with it. The 8 offerings can be placed on the altar as physical offerings, but should also be visualised. The reason why we place the actually offerings on the altar is to make a physical offering with our body, as well as a reminder that we make these offerings during our visualisations. If you are not able to make the physical offerings on your altar for whatever reason, this is ok. However you should try your best to have these offerings since it is a way for you to generate merit. The last offering of sound, is usually represented by the conch shell but can be anything that resembles sound, such as any instrument. For example, I know people who represent sound with a miniature flute or even a miniature guitar on their altars. In regards to the Nam Myoho Renge Khyo mantra, this is central to all forms of Nichiren Buddhism, which developed in Japan but is now practiced all over the world. It is said this mantra embodies the entire Lotus Sutra, which in itself explains what enlightenment is and the path to reach enlightenment, following Nichiren’s particular practice. Therefore this mantra is all encompassing, and central to the Nichiren tradition. I hope this helps. Thank you.
View All Questions

CHAT PICTURES

Dorje Shugden puja performed at Kechara House for sponsors. Lucy Yap
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Dorje Shugden puja performed at Kechara House for sponsors. Lucy Yap
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The smile on their faces make every effort worth the while. Stella, KSDS
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We enjoy doing events that bring fun and laughter to the under-privileges. Stella, KSDS
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A beautiful bouquet of flowers to show our gratitude to Pastor Adeline Woon for being the guide to KSDS for year 2016. Stella, KSDS
KSDS teachers group photo to mark the end of term 2016. See you again next year! Stella, KSDS
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KSDS teachers group photo to mark the end of term 2016. See you again next year! Stella, KSDS
Happy students of KSDS class 2-4 years old who performed at the graduation ceremony on November 20, 2016. Stella, KSDS
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Happy students of KSDS class 2-4 years old who performed at the graduation ceremony on November 20, 2016. Stella, KSDS
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Lamrim recitation in English ( Day 22 ) led by Pastor Gim Lee at Kechara House gompa on Monday at 8.00pm - 9.30pm
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Lamrim recitation in English ( Day 22 ) led by Pastor Gim Lee at Kechara House gompa on Monday at 8.00pm - 9.30pm
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Volunteers for Monday night food distribution. P.Patsy
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Dr Kesa, our volunteer doctor, treating some of our food recipients. P.Patsy
Monday night food distribution around Georgetown. P.Patsy
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Monday night food distribution around Georgetown. P.Patsy
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Mr. Cheah offered lights to Lama Tsongkhapa, Mother Tara, Dharma Protectors and all the Buddhas in Kechara Ipoh chapel today. So Kin Hoe (KISG)
Kit Ping was offering 8 bowls of water on the altar before the start of our short Mother Tara retreat in Kechara Ipoh chapel today. So Kin Hoe (KISG)
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Kit Ping was offering 8 bowls of water on the altar before the start of our short Mother Tara retreat in Kechara Ipoh chapel today. So Kin Hoe (KISG)
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Kechara Ipoh Study Group has completed a short Mother Tara retreat in Kechara Ipoh chapel today. So Kin Hoe (KISG)
H.E. the 25th Tsem Rinpoche gave a powerful teaching on the importance to create merits for our spiritual practice and for our life! Join the Dorje Shugden Puja every first Friday of the month!
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H.E. the 25th Tsem Rinpoche gave a powerful teaching on the importance to create merits for our spiritual practice and for our life! Join the Dorje Shugden Puja every first Friday of the month!
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We were blessed to have H.E. the 25th Tsem Rinpoche attending the Dorje Shugden Puja last Friday. Holy and melodious chanting and ritual instruments filled Wisdom Hall.
Memorable Dorje Shugden Puja in Wisdom Hall, Kechara Forest Retreat, December 2016
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Thank you Jia Seng for cleaning Wisdom Hall! - shared by Pastor Antoinette
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Enjoyed listen to the KSDS students sang Migtsema mantra. Alice Tay, KSDS
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2016 WOAH Camp~Discover Your Power. Please join and register now. Date:17/12-18/12. Venue: Kechara Forest Retreat. If interested, please contact Lin Mun 017 2042722, Victor 019 2732312, Alice 019 6686248. KSDS, Alice Tay
5 days ago
2016 WOAH Camp~Discover Your Power. Please join and register now. Date:17/12-18/12. Venue: Kechara Forest Retreat. If interested, please contact Lin Mun 017 2042722, Victor 019 2732312, Alice 019 6686248. KSDS, Alice Tay
Wonderful moment for Pastor Henry in distributing the free gift to the children during Lantern Festival Charity Bazaar. Alice Tay, KSDS.
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Wonderful moment for Pastor Henry in distributing the free gift to the children during Lantern Festival Charity Bazaar. Alice Tay, KSDS.
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Dorje Shugden
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