Myself with Geshe-la many years later in India, after I had become a monk. Thank you Geshe-la for taking in a scared, lonely 16 year old and showing him so much love and care.

In my life, I have been extremely fortunate to sit at the feet of great masters to receive teachings from them. Out of my 16 Gurus however, the one I spent the most time with, whether on a personal one-on-one basis or receiving formal teachings, was my second Guru, the Venerable Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen. And to think, how I came to meet Geshe-la was totally by chance… now when I look back, it all feels like a dream.

Geshe-la was immeasurably kind to me, as were all of my Gurus. It was through Geshe-la that I met my root Guru His Holiness Kyabje Zong Rinpoche. It was through Geshe-la that I was formally introduced to Dorje Shugden. It was from Geshe-la that I receive many teachings, commentaries and classes on rituals, like Lamrim class every single Sunday for eight years. It was Geshe-la who gave me a home and a roof over my head for eight years, otherwise I might have been homeless. Geshe-la even taught me how to cook lunch in five minutes (I had never even heard of instant noodles before this). It was also Geshe-la who advised me to call my adoptive mother and to try and make peace with her, which I will explain later. So from Geshe-la, I really received a lot.

How I came to meet Geshe-la, as I mentioned, was purely by so-called chance. After I ran away from New Jersey and arrived in Los Angeles, I settled down then started looking for a place to do my practice. Having a shrine and a temple to go to was something I had missed for many weeks and was desperate to find. So I looked in the phone book – at the time, there was no Internet so we looked up everyone in the phone book – and I found a place called Dharmadhatu. After I jotted down the address, I took a bus across town and arrived at their doorstep.

They occupied a shoplot that was facing a main street. I’m not sure if they had the ground floor too, but I know they definitely had the first floor. So I went to the front door downstairs which was blocked by a grille, and I looked up the stairs. At the top of the stairs, there was a Tibetan door curtain to the right, over an opened door. It was flapping lightly, I guess there must have been a light breeze that day. They had a doorbell so I rang it, and I kind of shook the grille and called out, “Hello! Hello! Is anybody there?”

The building where the College of Oriental Studies was located, where I met Dr. Leo Pruden who took me to see Geshe-la.

I could hear voices coming from upstairs and there were lights, but no one came to the front door even though I rang and knocked for a long time. I thought it was just so strange, maybe they were busy, they went for a meeting or something. So after a while, I thought, “Okay, they’re not going to open up” so I went back to the phone book and looked for other places. That’s when I saw an entry for “College of Oriental Studies” and in my baby mind, when I read ‘oriental’, I thought they must have an altar there.

So I went to the college and it was there that I met a very nice man by the name of Dr. Leo Pruden, who has since sadly passed away. Dr. Pruden said to me,

“Well, we don’t have an altar here because it’s a college but there is a Tibetan teacher that I know very well. I can introduce you to him if you like and he might be able to help you. Would you like that?”

I was completely overjoyed because I thought finally, I’ll have a place to pray! So I immediately said yes to Dr. Pruden and he kindly drove me over to another house, this time on St. Andrew’s Place. Later, I learned that the house was actually a Dharma centre called Thubten Dhargye Ling (TDL).

The first location of Thubten Dhargye Ling, where I stayed with Geshe-la for many years before we moved to the centre’s next location on LaCienega. It was here that I also met His Holiness Kyabje Zong Rinpoche.

Dr. Pruden took us both inside and when I walked in, oh my god, I could not believe my eyes. Geshe-la was right there in the living room that had been converted into a teaching and prayer hall. He was in meditation posture, sitting below a Lama Tsongkhapa set of statues, doing his meditations and practice. There was sunlight streaming in through the windows and all around were thangkas and statues. He was glowing and golden, and I thought to myself, “WOW.” I had no other words to describe him, he just looked so beautiful, exactly like what you would think a Tibetan grand master is supposed to look like.

Kind Dr. Leo Pruden on the right, with Most Ven. Dr. Thich Thien An. Together, they had founded the University of Oriental Studies. It was Dr. Pruden who introduced me to Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen who changed my life.

Immediately I offered three prostrations and then Dr. Pruden introduced me, saying to Geshe-la, “I’m very sorry to disturb you Geshe-la. I wasn’t supposed to come today but I have brought you a guest. This young man is looking for somewhere to pray and he came to our university. We don’t have an altar there so I thought I’d bring him to you.”

Then Dr. Pruden said to me, “Ok, I guess this is what you are looking for. I am taking off now.” I thanked him profusely and deeply appreciated his kindness. I was 16 or 17 at that time and was very young. Geshe-la welcomed me and asked me who I was. I introduced myself as a student of Kensur Rinpoche Lobsang Tharchin in Howell, New Jersey, and explained what happened with my family and why I was in Los Angeles. Geshe-la replied, “Oh, I know Geshe Lobsang Tharchin, he’s a very great teacher.” This made me happy to hear, that someone else was praising my Guru and it also told me about Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen-la’s own qualities, which was absolutely no jealousy or ego whatsoever. He had total respect for another teacher. That’s how it should be.

After some conversation, Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen said, “Okay well, I’m very busy right now so I can’t talk much to you. But you came on a very auspicious day, we are having tsok tonight.” I was really excited when I heard that because since I had run away from New Jersey, I had been looking for a place to do my practice. It was a commitment I had made to Kensur Rinpoche when I received higher tantric initiation from him, and I had never broken it and I was not intending to start breaking it. In fact, I have kept my commitments every single day since I received initiation from Kensur Rinpoche nearly 40 years ago.

Ever since I received higher tantric initiation from Kensur Rinpoche in New Jersey, I had not missed any of my commitments. So after arriving in Los Angeles, I was looking for a place to offer tsok twice a month, and Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen allowed me to join them in TDL.

So immediately I requested Geshe-la if I could join them that night, not to be his student but if I could just be in the centre and join in for tsok. Geshe-la looked at me and said, “You know how to do tsok?” I told Geshe-la that yes, I had received such and such initiations from Kensur Rinpoche. Geshe-la thought about it for a second and said, “Okay, you can come. Come back tonight at 7pm.”

I didn’t want to be late so I rushed back home and packed up my tsok stuff. It was only around 3-4pm and Geshe-la had told me to come back at 7pm so there were still a few more hours to go. Because I didn’t have much money on me, I couldn’t go anywhere so I just wandered around the city for a few hours. Then when 7pm came around, I went back to the centre and when I walked in, the place was packed. There were about 30 to 40 people there and it was just so exciting. It was exactly what I had been looking for. Together, we offered Lama Chopa tsok that night and because I was totally new, later on I found out that everyone had thought, “Who is this strange boy and how did he learn how to do tsok so well?”

My shrine in my room at TDL. I was so happy living here with my Guru Geshe-la, and so happy I was able to have my own altar. I would never have been allowed to have my own altar in New Jersey.

That night itself, I met all the Dharma students in TDL and to make a long story short, one of the committee members liked me very much so they lowered the rental for an empty room they had in the centre for me. At that time, I had been staying in my cousin Bob’s house since I arrived from New Jersey. Bob was much older than me and married, and had his own life and things to do so he was very kind to give me a place to stay in his house. But Bob thought that it would be good for me to be independent and anyway, I had always wanted to move out to a Dharma centre. So when the offer to live in TDL came up, I immediately grabbed it. I got myself a job at Fotomat and rented the room from the centre for US$150 a month, which at the time was a lot of money for me.

When I told Bob that I was moving out to a Dharma centre, he wasn’t surprised. He felt that if I wanted to move out, it was fine but perhaps I should explore the world and see more things before moving into a Dharma centre. At the same time, he was in contact with my parents in New Jersey and they were unhappy about hearing me move into a Dharma centre. They did not want me to go deeper into the Dharma and become a monk, and I guess they thought that if I was suffering in Los Angeles and things were difficult for me, that I would go back to New Jersey. Bob’s wife was a lovely Chinese woman named Pauline from Hong Kong. While I stayed at Bob’s place, Pauline was extremely kind to me, and gave me a lot of advice on how I should live my life and be a good person. She treated me just like an older sister that I wished I had had. She was concerned about me, and she scolded me, and she gave me advice and she generally treated me like her family. When I was moving out of their house, she was very concerned and she talked to me, and she made sure that it was what I wanted to do. I will never forget Pauline’s kindness towards me during a time when I really had no one.

So me moving out of Bob’s place and into a Dharma centre, put an end to all of my parents’ plans for me as it looked like I was one step closer to becoming a monk. So I packed up my two bags – I didn’t have a lot of stuff – and moved into a Dharma centre, which was my dream come true, to live near a teacher, in a Dharma centre, in a monastery – whatever you want to call it. We had our own temple inside, a gompa with thangkas and statues. Most of the time, unless there were events, pujas or teachings, it was just me and Geshe-la alone in the centre because we were the only two people staying there full-time.

Kensur Rinpoche Lobsang Tharchin, my first Guru in New Jersey who gave me permission to stay in TDL and study with Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen.

Eventually, I asked Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen if he would formally accept me as his student and allow me to formally receive teachings from him. But as per the teachings on Guru Devotion, I needed to ask my first Guru for permission, so I called up Kensur Rinpoche in New Jersey. If Kensur Rinpoche Lobsang Tharchin-la had said no, I would not have stayed. We need the blessings of our guru for any spiritual pursuits. If we cannot study with our teacher for good reasons and we go to another teacher, we need the blessings of our first teacher, otherwise we will not gain attainments or higher consciousness. The good spiritual relationship (samaya) between teacher and student is extremely vital for gaining higher insights in meditations, especially in higher forms of meditation. Having negative samaya with the teacher not only stunts our spiritual growth in general, but every day the samaya remains broken, heavy negative karma is accumulated daily which will open to bring many obstacles. Obstacles of body and mind. This is clearly stated by Vajradhara and great Indian adepts.

First, I apologised to Kensur Rinpoche for running away. I told Kensur Rinpoche what had happened, where I was and what I was doing. I said that I had never wanted to leave him but my parents and the situation at home were becoming extremely difficult so I felt I had no choice. Also, my parents were spreading very nasty rumours about him and I did not want them to hurt him that way and they wanted to get him deported because of me. I apologised to Kensur Rinpoche for their defamation of him. Kensur Rinpoche listened carefully and said it’s alright, he was glad that I was safe, and said he understood because in reality, he already knew about how my adoptive parents had been treating me. My adoptive parents were going to say he was breaking up families by allowing me to the temple to his teachings and, on those grounds, report him to get his visa status cancelled and deport him. I couldn’t have that. So I had to leave my home. I could not give up my Dharma practice and I could not be the cause of my parents attempting to make such trouble for such a great master. I was so sad to leave home, friends and some relatives I cared about. I had to hitch-hike at 15 years old across the country from New Jersey to California. I thought I would rather die hitch-hiking than not practise and pursue the Dharma at that time.

I explained to Kensur Rinpoche that I could not return to New Jersey in the near future but I wanted to continue studying the Dharma. Then I asked Kensur Rinpoche for permission to take Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen as my teacher. It was then Kensur Rinpoche said exactly this to me,

“You are very lucky to meet Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen who is the same as I am and his knowledge is very great. You should treat him like you would treat me.“

I hung up and prostrated to the phone that I had just used to speak with Kensur Rinpoche. I was totally and completely overwhelmed. Not only had I received permission from Kensur Rinpoche to study with Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen, but how Kensur Rinpoche gave me permission instantly made my faith in him grow even stronger (if that was even possible!). Kensur Rinpoche had absolutely no ego about me receiving teachings from another master because the situation deemed it very necessary. If Kensur Rinpoche had told me no or if he had hesitated, I would have left TDL immediately because my first Guru did not give me permission to stay. I must obey my teacher. Later years I would return to visit my first teacher in New Jersey a few times. I kept my relationship with him very sacred and very high priority. I never forgot his kindness. I visited him in Sera Monastery from where he is from in India when I was in India. I was in Gaden Monastery and I would take the bus (16 hours) to Sera Monastery to visit him when he visited Sera.

But all Kensur Rinpoche cared about was my Dharma education and practice, from a qualified master. On top of that, Kensur Rinpoche even praised Geshe-la which he did not need to do. Because of that, my faith in Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen instantly grew and I had no doubts because my first Guru told me to treat him as an equal. From that day onwards, I have not doubted Geshe-la once because my first Guru gave me his blessings. I visualised both my gurus as one with the Buddha and honoured them both.

Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen, my second Guru and the spiritual guide of Thubten Dhargye Ling (TDL) in Los Angeles, USA

I rushed to report to Geshe-la what Kensur Rinpoche said, including the praise Kensur Rinpoche had for him. All Geshe-la said was, “Okay, now go and make me a cup of tea.” Geshe-la liked to drink Indian tea so I would make it for him many times daily very often throughout the years I was with him, sometimes up to eight cups a day. But after I reported that to Geshe-la, he had no reaction other than to ask for tea. No “tell me more” or “what else did he say”. Immediately, my faith in him grew a thousand-fold and I thought, what a great master I have come across, someone who is totally disinterested in the Eight Worldly Dharmas and how fortunate I am to have taken refuge in a person with such qualities. Wow.

So as you know, the reason I had run away from New Jersey was because my adoptive parents had been forcefully trying to stop me from pursuing the Dharma. I was very much beaten and punished for many years. It was very painful physically and emotionally. So later, after I had settled down in Los Angeles, Geshe-la had me call up my adoptive mom in New Jersey. Geshe-la said I should apologise for the hurt I had caused her by running away. Balking at the suggestion, I said to Geshe-la, “Apologise to her? But she’s the one who abused me and beat me! I’m the one who got beaten, I’m the one who was screamed at, I’m the one who was slapped, hurt and abused for many years!” I was not trying to be rude or disrespect Geshe-la but I did not understand why I had to apologise to my mom. My mom, Dana, was at heart a warm, wonderful and very generous woman, and I love her very much. To this day, I miss her. But she also had schizophrenia which was not diagnosed until many years later, and at the time she was having breakdowns which were triggered by my father. He was constantly cheating on her, and she had nowhere else to direct her hurt and pain towards so I became a target. Life at home was always very tense and I was always on knife’s edge, because the slightest mistake would trigger her to beat me black and blue. Very often I would return home from school to a house full of smashed plates and everything topsy-turvy, because mom had just found out about another one of my dad’s affairs.

I have been told by monks that when they were very young and living in the monastery, they all called Geshe-la “Geshe Okay” because every time he was asked to do something, he would smile and reply, “Okay!” Geshe-la loved and supported Gaden Monastery very much.

To top it off, she did not want me to become a monk. Both my parents wanted me to grow up and go to college, get a job, get married and have children. They were doing everything possible to try and stop me from pursuing Dharma, from going to the temple in New Jersey, from reading Dharma books, from doing prayers. But at the time, I did not know that my mom was schizophrenic or anything like that; all I knew was that she was beating me.

So when Geshe-la told me to call her and apologise, you can imagine why I was surprised. Still, Geshe-la insisted that I call her and when I asked why, he said to me,

“Because you don’t only look at the negative things your mother did – you have to look at the positive. You’re here. Someone fed you. Someone gave you a house. You’re here in the centre learning Dharma due to her kindness. You call her and say you’re sorry for the things you said to her and for the things you thought about her.”

I asked Geshe-la, “But what if she hangs up?” Geshe-la told me, “It’s okay. At least you tried so that when you do your sadhana, it comes from your heart, it is real.” It will be real when I do my sadhana, prayers and practice because from my side I made peace with someone that I had much conflict with and I had to let go of my anger. If they let go or not, it is up to them. But I had to let go of my anger in order to evolve spiritually. Since I am not the type to disobey my Gurus, I called my mom. I apologised to her for running away and as predicted, she hung up immediately.

I went to report to Geshe-la what had happened. It was a very emotional, difficult call for me to make and I thought Geshe-la would tell me “good job” or comfort me, or he would praise me for following his instructions but Geshe-la only said, “Okay, now go and make me a cup of tea.” I was like, “Oh” and I went to make Geshe-la his tea. Years later, I realised if Geshe-la had not made me call my mom, there is a chance I might have hung on to the pain for many years. Although my anger towards her could be justified due to the way she had treated me, Geshe-la was teaching me how to let go and how to cut the negative karma so that I would not hurt her again in the future. Also for me not to remain in hurt, I had to let go. This was the best counselling for emotional trauma anyone can get. You see, whether the other person lets go, admits they’re wrong or not, it is not about them. Sometimes the person may have passed away and there is no chance of hearing from them their apologies, so we have to heal anyways. It is about us healing and growing. So when we let go, we heal and we grow. Geshe-la, in his infinite wisdom, instructed me to do this and I obeyed. I didn’t have to go for decades of expensive American counselling to get over my pain and anguish. Buddha’s teachings are excellent for this, among many other things.

Geshe-la said to me, “You didn’t do anything now but you must have done something in your previous life to get this. Either you accept karma or you don’t. He taught me not to be selective of Buddha’s teachings. To pick what was easy and ignore what was difficult but necessary to practice. If you want to practise Dharma, if you want to gain attainments and if you want to progress, you have to accept that it’s your karma. You have to let it go.” With Geshe-la, the Eight Verses of Thought Transformation was not just a prayer but something that is alive, and should be practised and lived.

The Kadampa geshe and master Venerable Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen

For the eight years I lived with Geshe-la, I had the tremendous privilege, honour and the merits to cook, clean and serve this great Kadampa style master. Again, most of the time, it was just the two of us in the centre because we were the only ones living there full-time and some of the others went off to work. Everyone else lived and worked outside, and came to the centre for events, pujas and teachings. As for myself, I would go out to work, in places like Fotomat or the realtors Fred Sands and John Douglas. Then I would come back to cook dinner, and sometimes lunch, for Geshe-la depending. I lived downstairs and Geshe-la lived upstairs, and every single day I had the pleasure and meritorious opportunity to clean Geshe-la’s room, to make tea for him up to eight times a day – Geshe-la liked tea a lot – to do his laundry, to clean up the meditation hall (gompa), to do his shopping and to basically maintain his whole house. Sometimes when Geshe-la went out, I had the great honour to accompany him and to help him carry his things.

Geshe-la was the one who taught me how to make tormas. He showed me what ingredients to put, what shapes to make and I memorised it and that was that. Geshe-la only showed me once and after that, I was in charge of making all the tormas for the pujas, including for the monthly Dorje Shugden kangsol. I would have to go out and buy the barley and roast it, and grind it down to make our own tsampa (roasted barley flour) for the tormas. It was not like today where you can just go to the supermarket and buy it, back then everything we had to do by ourselves. If I didn’t pay attention, the barley would burn and I would have to start all over again, and it would take even more time. Wow, some my tormas were really not very good and were too soft and leaned over, or they were too dry and they cracked, or they were different heights but Geshe-la never said anything because he knew I was making them sincerely and doing my best. Sometimes I would be making the tormas then I would accidentally get some red colouring on the white tormas and shoot! I would have to start all over again. The tormas had to be as perfect as I could get them in my own way, because they were an offering to the Buddhas.

Geshe-la (left) with His Holiness Kyabje Trijang Chocktrul Rinpoche and Kyabje Lati Rinpoche. Although many people claim Geshe-la gave up Dorje Shugden, I know he never did because Geshe-la was extremely devoted to Dorje Shugden. Later on, he practised secretly. He had too. I saw this for myself in the eight years I lived with Geshe-la. Also, if Geshe-la had given up Dorje Shugden, he would not have posed for a picture with Kyabje Trijang Chocktrul Rinpoche who is a Dorje Shugden lama.

So on some puja days, I would be really rushed for time. I would have to go out to work then I would rush back and buy the torma ingredients, and come back and prepare the tormas and set up for the puja, and also prepare lunch for Geshe-la and myself. On one of those days when I was really rushed, and it was just Geshe-la and me in the centre as usual, Geshe-la said, “Okay, I will teach you how to make lunch in five minutes.” I was slightly incredulous, not because I doubted Geshe-la but because I thought, “Lunch? In five minutes? How?” I had never heard of anything like that.

So Geshe-la took me to the kitchen and he chopped up some veggies like tomatoes and onion and cabbage, and he threw it in a small pot then he added the noodles and powder from the packets and voila. Five minutes later, there was lunch! I was so surprised because coming from New Jersey, I had never seen anything like that. Geshe-la of course, had become familiar with instant noodles from his time living in the refugee settlements in India. Then Geshe-la said, “Okay, now you clean up” and he went upstairs to have his lunch and I stayed back to clean up the kitchen. So there were many personal moments that I had with Geshe-la that were just like that, when it was just the two of us.

Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen (left) with another grand master of Tibetan Buddhism, Kyabje Lati Rinpoche who was also one of my Gurus. Kyabje Lati Rinpoche encouraged me to teach dharma to people, serve the monastery and be devoted to Dorje Shugden. Both great masters have since entered clear light and passed away, and their reincarnations have been found, recognised and are back in Gaden Shartse Monastery. Kyabje Lati Rinpoche took rebirth and was found in Mustang, Nepal.

There were many, many teachings that Geshe-la gave us, but never once did Geshe-la give any of us initiation. Geshe-la told us that as long as his Guru His Holiness Kyabje Zong Rinpoche was alive, we should get initiations from Kyabje Zong Rinpoche and there was no need for himself to give it. It was not that Geshe-la was not qualified to give the initiations but as long as his Guru was available, Geshe-la always deferred to his teacher. That is how humble and how devoted Geshe-la was to his Guru.

After Kyabje Zong Rinpoche left the centre, it was Geshe-la who gave us the full commentaries on the initiations we received and gave us all the classes on the rituals and went through the meditations with us. For example, we received Dorje Shugden sogtae (life entrustment initiation) from His Holiness Kyabje Zong Rinpoche, but it was Geshe-la who taught us about the background, history, lineage and origins of Dorje Shugden, using His Holiness Kyabje Trijang Rinpoche‘s text Music Delighting the Ocean of Protectors. And every week for years and years, Geshe-la would teach the real path to enlightenment from just the Lamrim. He taught us that transformation is based on compassion, and if we do not transform then it shows our lack of compassion and this will not make us really happy. It was Geshe-la who taught me that the more compassion we have for others and even for ourselves, the easier it is to transform.

During the time when I lived with Geshe-la, there were a few instances during which Geshe-la scolded me. I know in those times, some people would have thought that Geshe-la was being unreasonable or too harsh on me but Geshe-la was a real practitioner, only interested in benefiting others even if it meant risking his reputation.

On one occasion, many years later, we were expecting a visit from His Holiness the 98th Gaden Tri Rinpoche Jetsun Jamphel Shenphen. Before Gaden Tri Rinpoche arrived at our centre when it was on LaCienega, I noticed that someone had rearranged the altar incorrectly. The centre had been cleaned from top to bottom so that it would be perfect for when Gaden Tri Rinpoche came but someone, whoever it was, had put the Dharma texts lower and the statues higher on the altar.

I saw that so I grabbed a chair from the kitchen, climbed up and rearranged the altar to put the Dharma texts on top. Geshe-la happened to walk in while I was doing it and saw that there were chairs strewn around, and things had been removed from the altar. There must have been 20 to 25 people around at the time. Immediately, Geshe-la manifested signs of displeasure and asked who had done it. I said it was me. In front of everyone, Geshe-la scolded me and said, “Who told you to do this? I never told you to do it this way, Gaden Tri Rinpoche is coming soon.” Gaden Tri Rinpoche really was arriving very soon and Geshe-la did not want Gaden Tri Rinpoche to walk into the centre and see that the altar was a mess, there were chairs in the gompa, there was someone standing on chairs to arrange things, and basically everything was taken out.

I was so embarrassed when Geshe-la scolded me. But I quickly put it all back the way I had found it and brought the chair back to the kitchen. Then I returned to Geshe-la and made three prostrations and apologised.

Later, we got a call that Gaden Tri Rinpoche’s arrival was going to be delayed. So Geshe-la came and said to all of us, “Actually, Dharma texts should always go on the top. Burcha was right earlier but I just did not want Gaden Tri Rinpoche to come in and see all that mess” and then had us quickly put it back to exactly the way I had done it before. Geshe-la was exceptionally upset at that incident with me and I was extremely frightened, and I thought, “I’ll just do whatever Geshe-la wants because he always has a reason.” But what I was happy about was I didn’t have any negative thoughts or retaliate. In the many years I lived with Geshe-la, I have never ever retaliated or spoken back to him. I kept my behaviour in accordance with the Guru Devotion texts as best as I could.

In fact, I know there were people in the centre who spoke badly of Geshe-la and whispered things behind his back. I will not repeat what they said here because none of it is true. But I know they were talking because sometimes, I would be in the kitchen washing up after dinner or cleaning and putting things away, and they would come up to me and start talking or try to pull me into the conversation. According to teachings on Guru Devotion, once you have taken refuge in a teacher, you should not disparage them or think negative thoughts about them. In fact, you should not even associate with people who disparage your Guru, let alone sit and talk and gossip with them, because they can affect your practice if you are not strong enough. It’s not me who said this but it is according to tantric code and the Guru Devotion teachings. So I would let these people know politely but firmly that I was not interested in anything they had to say. I think they didn’t like that but I had taken refuge with Geshe-la and received teachings from him and although I was young and liked to have fun just like any other teenager, when it came to my Dharma practice, especially the teachings on Guru Devotion, I was (and still am) very firm and serious about it. Geshe-la was my Guru and that was that.

His Holiness Kyabje Zong Rinpoche with his two well-known disciples, Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen (left) and Lama Yeshe (right). Both of them were very devoted to Kyabje Zong Rinpoche and brought benefit to many beings throughout their lives. This picture was taken when Lama Yeshe came to TDL in Los Angeles to visit Kyabje Zong Rinpoche. It was at this time I was able to meet Lama Yeshe for the first time. He gave me a little gift. A Tibetan aryuvedic pill for healing (rinchen rilbu).

When Geshe-la was with us, he was our teacher but in the presence of Kyabje Zong Rinpoche, Geshe-la became like a young student again. He was meek, humble and basically, the 50 Stanzas of Guru Devotion come to life. If Kyabje Zong Rinpoche did not ask him to sit down, he would remain standing and would not sit down until he was asked to do so. Sometimes Kyabje Zong Rinpoche would forget to tell Geshe-la to sit, so Geshe-la would remain standing for hours, his hands clasped in front of him and his head slightly bowed, listening intently to Kyabje Zong Rinpoche. He would nod from time to time and say ‘yes’ to acknowledge Kyabje Zong Rinpoche, and he would remain like this, unmoving and not fidgeting for hours.

Some people would say this is fanaticism but if you read the accounts of great Indian and Tibetan masters who are attained, you will see all of them have one thing in common, which is great Guru Devotion. The student Naropa and the master Tilopa, the disciple Milarepa and his teacher Marpa, the sisters Mekhala and Kanakhala with their Guru Krsnacharya, or students like Shungsep Jetsun and Nangsa Obum – there are countless more examples to show that attainments are impossible without Guru Devotion and if someone has great Guru Devotion, it is a sign that they are attained or they will gain attainments. Why? Guru Devotion in actuality, is not about prostrating at your teacher’s feet, or serving him or doing his laundry or cooking for him. All those are outer expressions of Guru Devotion. The real Guru Devotion is the inner Guru Devotion which is transformation, and devotion to the Guru is actually devotion to the state of mind that we want to accomplish, which is reflected in the form of our teacher. How devoted you are to your Guru is how much you have transformed since the day you met him. If you have not transformed much, then you have to reflect why and do something about it immediately.

Anyway, I just wanted to share this story with you. That is how I came to meet Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen and came to stay in Thubten Dhargye Ling for eight years, until I left Los Angeles for India where I became a monk. I arrived in Thubten Dhargye Ling (TDL) because for whatever reason, Dharmadhatu did not open their doors; because Dr. Leo Pruden showed great kindness to a young boy and drove him to the centre instead of telling him to scram; because Kensur Rinpoche gave me permission to receive teachings from another master; because Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen gave me permission to stay in the centre. In fact, Geshe-la could have gotten into trouble because I was not yet 18 years old and so technically still underaged but Geshe-la took the risk and let me in. He educated me, cared for me, gave me so much knowledge that I am able to share with others and benefit them to this day. It was from Geshe-la or through Geshe-la’s connections that I received all of the teachings and knowledge I now pass on to others about Dorje Shugden. So perhaps it will benefit some people to learn a bit more about my experiences with Geshe-la and my time in TDL. Geshe-la touched my life and helped me immeasurably, and I will be forever grateful to him.

Tsem Rinpoche

Venerable Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen

Geshe-la was very close to His Holiness the Dalai Lama, and over the years, Geshe-la and TDL hosted the Dalai Lama in Los Angeles three times. Geshe-la also sponsored many teachings by the Dalai Lama, some of which I attended with Geshe-la in India. Geshe-la continued to practise Dorje Shugden secretly, yet not rock the relationship with His Holiness.

Ven. Geshe Tsultim Gyeltsen was the founder and spiritual director of Thubten Dhargye Ling. He was born in 1924 in the Kham province of eastern Tibet. His parents named him Jamphel Yeshe and at a young age he was inspired by the example of his uncle who was a monk at the local monastery. When the boy was only seven, he and his family decided that he would enter monastic life. For nine years he studied sutra and tantra and received teachings on dialectics under the tutelgae of Geshe Jampa Thaye, a highly respected teacher from Sera Monastery.

When he was sixteen, Geshe Gyeltsen decided to continue his studies and left for Lhasa, the capital of Tibet, to study for his Geshe degree at Sera Monastery. The Geshe degree in the Gelug school is comparable to a western doctorate in Buddhist philosophy. The difference is that it usually takes more than twenty years to complete.

Geshe-la set out on the thirty-three day trek across twenty-five mountain passes, the only monk in a party of fifteen merchants and pilgrims. Near Lhasa, they stopped near Gaden Monastery where some monks invited Geshe-la for tea the following day. The next morning as he climbed the hill toward Gaden, he saw the great monastery for the first time looking as though it would touch the sky. He wept tears of joy and knew without question that it was here, and not Sera, where he would continue his studies. That day was the anniversary of Lama Tsong Khapa’s enlightenment. In the evening the light offerings of butter lamps and the sound of chanting filled every room in the monastery and Geshe-la felt deeply moved by its spiritual atmosphere.

He joined Shartse College, one of Gaden’s two main colleges. The abbot at that time was the late Kyabje Zong Rinpoche who took a special interest in the young monk’s progress. Geshe Gyeltsen studied logic, wisdom, compassion, ethics, phenomenology and mind training at Gaden for twenty years and later became a teacher of junior monks.

After the Tibetan Uprising of March 10th, 1959, word reached Gaden that the Dalai Lama had left Tibet. Geshe-la and a group of six other monks left the monastery after evening prayers and made their way to India across the Himalayas; members of a mass exodus fleeing the oppression of the Chinese Communist occupation. Geshe-la was one of the few senior monks who managed to escape out of the twenty thousand monks that had lived at Gaden, Sera and Drepung, Tibet’s three largest monasteries.

Geshe Gyeltsen, with fifty of the most highly regarded monks from each monastery, resettled at Dalhousie in northern India where he studied for two more years before taking his final Geshe examinations. These were attended by masters from all schools of Tibetan Buddhism. The last week of his exams took place in Dharamsala where Geshe-la engaged in rigorous debates under the scrutiny of the Dalai Lama and his two senior tutors, the late Ling Rinpoche and the late Kyabje Trijang Rinpoche. He passed with honors and was awarded the highest degree of Lharampa Geshe.

In 1963 Geshe-la traveled to Sussex, England to teach at the Pestalozzi International Children’s Village. He arrived with twenty-two Tibetan children who were mostly orphans or the children of parents still living in Tibet. For seven years Geshe-la instructed these children in Tibetan writing, grammar, culture and Buddhist philosophy.

Geshe Gyeltsen came to the United States in 1976 and briefly held positions at USC, UC Santa Barbara, and at UCLA where he taught meditation and Tibetan language. His university students requested that he start a teaching center and in 1978 Geshe-la founded a center for the study of Buddhism in Los Angeles.

Geshe-la requested His Holiness the Dalai Lama to name the center and His Holiness gave the name of Thubten Dhargye Ling, which means Land of Flourishing Dharma. Thubten Dhargye Ling is now based in Long Beach where Geshe Gyeltsen’s teaching tradition continues through classes in meditation, retreats, celebrations of religious holidays and the regular weekly teachings of traditional Buddhist texts.

Geshe-la requested His Holiness the Dalai Lama to name the center and His Holiness gave the name of Thubten Dhargye Ling (TDL), which means Land of Flourishing Dharma. Thubten Dhargye Ling is now based in Long Beach where Geshe Gyeltsen’s teaching tradition continues through classes in meditation, retreats, celebrations of religious holidays and the regular weekly teachings of traditional Buddhist texts.

Geshe Gyeltsen was the author of “Compassion: The Key to Great Awakening,” a commentary on the Eight Verses of Mind Training and the Thirty-seven Practices of a Bodhisattva, and a free book on emptiness “Mirror of Wisdom“. He founded centers in both Colorado and Texas and has students based in Mexico, Alaska, Omaha and England. Geshe-la was involved in the Buddhist Sangha Council of Southern California, a group of representatives from various Buddhist countries dedicated to further understanding between Buddhist cultures. He actively worked for human rights and true autonomy for the Tibetan people. One of his goals was to further education and religious study in Tibetan communities throughout India.

Geshe Gyeltsen was known for his great compassion and personal warmth; yet he retained a very traditional and uncompromising approach to teaching the Dharma. His strength of vision and devotion to his practice transcended time and culture, and he continues to inspire his students with the legacy he brought from Tibet.

Geshela passed away on February 13, 2009 and is greatly missed by all his students and friends.

Source: https://gstdl.org/teacher

Photos and videos of Geshe-la

Below are some more photos and videos of Geshe-la, I miss him so much. After the ban on Dorje Shugden, I was never able to speak with him again but I know Geshe-la never forgot me, as I came to learn from some of his students. If I had spoken to Geshe-la, then the Tibetan government in exile will make problems for Geshe-la. The reason being, Geshe-la went underground and secret with his practice of Dorje Shugden but I went open with it. So in 1996, when the Tibetan government proclaimed their ban against Dorje Shugden, many people went underground. I went underground for a while and then came out. Geshe-la never said one negative word against Dorje Shugden.

There was no freedom within Tibetan settlements in India contrary to what is ‘marketed’ to the west. The Tibetan government in exile and their ‘rule’ of the Tibetan refugees in India and Nepal was far from the utopian Shangril-la methods they like to portray. Many Tibetans are disillusioned with the Tibetan leaders I am told. I lived there and I know. Many monks and lay people left as it was very controlling. They are still leaving now. Geshe-la entered clear light on February 13, 2009 and completed his meditation over three days later, on February 16 at around 4pm. His reincarnation has since been found and recognised by His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama, which you can see in the video below.

Myself (far right) with His Holiness Kyabje Zong Rinpoche (second from left) and Geshe-la (far left). This is the last photograph I ever took with Kyabje Zong Rinpoche, and it was shot just before Kyabje Zong Rinpoche left TDL after spending six wonderful months with us. After that, I would never see Kyabje Zong Rinpoche again so this photo is very bittersweet for me.

His Holiness Kyabje Zong Rinpoche (right) with Geshe-la (left) and John Denver in Aspen, Colorado

Taken in Yucca Valley in 1981. Kyabje Zong Rinpoche, with the beard, is seated with Geshe-la (without glasses) on his left. Surrounding them are some of the TDL students.

Renunciation and the six realms
by Ven. Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen

Or view the video on the server at:
https://video.tsemtulku.com/videos/GTGRenunciation.mp4

Karma, the origins of suffering and the path to enlightenment
by Ven. Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen

Or view the video on the server at:
https://video.tsemtulku.com/videos/GTGKarmaSuffering.mp4

A short interview
with Ven. Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen

Or view the video on the server at:
https://video.tsemtulku.com/videos/GTGInterview.mp4

His Holiness Kyabje Zong Rinpoche explains
Dorje Shugden initiation and benefits

Kyabje Zong Rinpoche was an erudite scholar, ritual master and practitioner of the highest degree from Tibet. At the request of Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen, one of the pioneers who taught Tibetan Buddhism in America, Kyabje Zong Rinpoche gives clear explanations and advice about the life-entrustment initiation of Dorje Shugden and how to go about the practice and get the maximum benefits in this video.

Or view the video on the server at:
https://video.tsemtulku.com/videos/ZongRinpocheConfersDorjeShugdenInitiationSubtitle.mp4

H.H. the 14th Dalai Lama cuts the hair
of Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen’s reincarnation

Geshe-la’s incarnation seems to be not pleased with His Holiness the Dalai Lama if you notice in this video. Unusual. Most incarnations are very happy to meet the Dalai Lama again.

Or view the video on the server at:
https://video.tsemtulku.com/videos/HHDLGTGHaircutCeremony.mp4

For more interesting information:

• Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen’s special thangka | 属于格西簇亲格而辛的非凡唐卡
• My First Guru in New Jersey
• H.H. Kyabje Zong Rinpoche’s biography
• Dorje Shugden: My side of the story | 多杰雄登：我这方面的说法
• I can speak up now about Shugden
• My Precious Teachers
• They were not wrong
• Which Dorje Shugden Style Is Your Favourite?
• Rime Thangkas (Free Download)

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