Devoting Yourself to a Guru Who Has Passed On
(By Pastor David Lai)
Understanding impermanence, especially death, is one of the most important teachings in the earlier sections of the Lamrim, or the Stages on the Path to Enlightenment. His Eminence Tsem Rinpoche used to say that impermanence is not a uniquely Buddhist concept but is something that is universal. Everyone who is born must eventually meet their demise and there is no exception to this rule. Contemplation on this inevitability can bring about tremendous spiritual transformation.
As Rinpoche previously explained, we are not meant to depend on our guru or spiritual teacher indefinitely. The moment we meet a qualified teacher, he or she does everything within their means to prepare us to be separated from them. The physical outer guru is actually training us to become the inner guru. When this eventually happens, we no longer need to depend on him or her as the outer guru. Ultimately, the guru prepares us to meet with the inevitable, which is our own death. The guru teaches us that from the moment we are born, we only get closer to death. No matter who we meet in life, all situations eventually lead to separation. Therefore, the guru’s parinirvana is actually a final experiential teaching on death and impermanence for students.
When Tsem Rinpoche left his earthly body in 2019 after two days of successive thukdham – clear light meditation on death – many of his students and friends from around the world were devastated by the news. After overcoming their initial shock, people were generally in a quandary as to how to continue their spiritual journey as many had relied on Rinpoche for spiritual guidance, instruction and teachings. Since Rinpoche’s parinirvana was unexpected, there may still be some of us who do not know how to come to terms with it, and it has left a void in our hearts.
Don’t Forget Instructions and Promises
When we’re in mourning for someone, it is normal to be emotional, especially if the person was close to us. Rinpoche had a very special way of relating to people and benefiting everyone he met, even on the Internet. Therefore, it is not unusual for many people to feel particularly close to Rinpoche, even if they never met Rinpoche personally.
Although it’s perfectly alright to be upset, Rinpoche would have preferred it if we channelled our energy towards something positive instead of wallowing in our sorrow. We do this by recalling the advice and instructions that we have not completed, or left unfulfilled, especially those related to formal Dharma practice and work. Ideally, we should fulfil all of our guru’s instructions and advice to us but due to time and various obstacles, we may have to prioritise what is essential. Then we work through the list, especially if there is a long list of instructions and we don’t even know where to start. We can prioritise based on our current schedule and workload. It is important to review each instruction based on its purpose and the relevance of completing it. Even if the instruction is no longer relevant or applicable, we may want to find a way to fulfil it in a different manner in order to accomplish what our guru had intended for us to accomplish.
But what about students who did not receive specific instructions? The same concept applies but is also linked to how much we have transformed our minds. We analyse our lives according to the guru’s teachings, and then we work on our individual issues by applying the Dharma, one at a time.
When we fulfil the advice or instructions of our teacher no matter how big or seemingly trivial, we reap the benefits that the guru intended for us. This repairs and fortifies our spiritual bond with the teacher and adds to the collective merits needed to find the teacher’s incarnation. Since the teacher’s next incarnation has the potential to be tremendously beneficial, a lot of merits are needed to find his or her incarnation. A simple way to generate the merits needed to meet the teacher again is for students and friends to engage in our daily sadhanas, especially reciting the teacher’s swift return prayer and name mantra.
Continue to Support Your Lama’s Work
In addition, we should have a sense of responsibility to help maintain and ensure that the organisation, temple or institution that was founded by our teacher survives. We can do our part by getting involved in its activities, pujas, and so forth. Just because we do not have official responsibilities, an office or job in the organisation, it doesn’t mean we don’t get involved. If we value our guru’s teachings, lineage and blessings, then we should get involved in whatever capacity that we can.
There are bound to be people we don’t get along with within any organisation or group of people. However, for our guru’s sake, we should put aside disagreements or grievances with these people and still get involved with the events and activities of the centre. After all, as devoted practitioners, part of our practice is to let go of our egos. We do not need to be overly friendly with these people but at least be civil.
If we have had negative experiences with such people, we should not gossip or talk negatively about them or anyone else, as this will paint a very bad picture of you and the centre as a whole. This is schismatic talk and can create division in the centre. In fact, it is considered to be a heinous sin within Buddhism, so we should avoid such actions like the plague. Since we are practising the Dharma thanks to our teacher, we should not forget this fact and we should not let such issues become obstacles to fulfilling our duty as a student.
We should help when necessary but more importantly, we should be nurturing to those who are new, don’t know who the teacher is and do not know much Dharma. In the past, Rinpoche gave many teachings and did all the nurturing. Now, it is up to senior students to take over. By sharing the Dharma and answering people’s questions, senior students are actually practising the Dharma.
We should encourage people to join the centre and its activities. Be deferential and respectful to those who hold roles and responsibilities. This means following the rules and regulations of the centre and following its programmes. Naturally, if we have suggestions or complaints, it would be good to give constructive feedback to the management of the centre.
Search for the Incarnation
Last but not least, there are important pujas and rituals that need to be done, including the construction and consecration of the stupa that enshrines the teacher’s relics. In some cases, the teacher may have left behind instructions on what to do after his or her parinirvana. If not, then the teacher’s assistants and devoted students can consult senior monks and lamas on what pujas and rituals to do. At this point, it is important to be harmonious when engaging in this sacred task.
All students and friends of the guru should come together in order to raise the needed funds, gather the necessary items, manage the logistics, make arrangements for monks and other lamas to engage in swift return pujas and rituals, organise the construction of the stupa, help in any capacity they can, and so forth.
If the students are harmonious and when the right rituals and pujas are done to consecrate the stupa, a tremendous amount of merit is generated for the discovery of the teacher’s incarnation. For a high lama who is attained, no rituals are actually needed for the lama to take rebirth at will. However, for students to accurately locate his unmistaken incarnation, the construction and consecration of the guru’s stupa, as well as various pujas, are essential.
The search for the teacher’s incarnation is usually spearheaded by the Ladrang (the teacher’s household) or the teacher’s personal assistants. The process of looking for the incarnation begins when unusual dreams of the lama are observed by close disciples. These dreams are analysed for potential clues by consulting high lamas of the lineage. Eventually, when sufficient clues are gathered, divination questions are presented to the high lamas and to Dorje Shugden through his oracle for further clarification.
This process may take years before anything substantial arises. Eventually, when a particular location is pinpointed through divination and advice from Dorje Shugden, representatives of the Ladrang will look for potential candidates in that area. Candidates are shortlisted, and then through a series of tests and divinations by high lamas and Dorje Shugden, the unmistaken incarnation is proclaimed. The incarnation is then enthroned and recognised by the monastery the previous incarnation belonged to, high lamas, and Dorje Shugden. This is a very brief explanation and gives a little overview of the actual process. The details may vary according to tradition and lineage.
Conclusion
The most important thing of all is to keep the memory of our guru alive through our Dharma practice, learning and the continuous contemplation of the teacher’s activities and qualities. It is important to cherish these memories and more importantly, the legacy of what the teacher has given to us and the world. This legacy is the teachings of the Dharma, the unique teachings of the lineage, and the organisation which is charged to preserve and proliferate these teachings.
The advice contained within this article actually comes, for the most part, from what Rinpoche himself had previously taught, and also a little bit from what I have read over the years. Some of the advice was covered in the Book Club discussion on The Promise (Day 2) which you can watch in the video below, and at the same time I have elaborated on the topics a little, with the hope that it clarifies some of what I spoke about.
Book Club: The Promise (Part 1-9)
For more interesting information:
- The Exaggeration of Attachment
- Introduction to the Four Noble Truths
- Why Non-Attachment Is One of the Keys to a Happy Life & Relationship
- Snakes, Roosters and Pigs by Tsem Rinpoche
- Ten Counterproductive Behaviors of Well-Intentioned People
- Finding Deeper Meaning in Life with Dorje Shugden
- Tales With My Lama: Daily Practice
- Tales With My Lama: Laugh Away Your Ego
- Tales With My Lama: Why Rinpoche Has To Suffer
- Tales With My Lama: Larger Than Life
- Tales With My Lama: Manjushri
- Tales With My Lama: Audience With Tsem Rinpoche
Please support us so that we can continue to bring you more Dharma:
If you are in the United States, please note that your offerings and contributions are tax deductible. ~ the tsemrinpoche.com blog team
According to Buddhism, everything in human life, all objects will one day disappeared, we cannot change that for sure. Everything changes and nothing will last forever. From our emotions to our thoughts and feelings, from the cells in our bodies to the plants around us, will somehow change and decay soon or later.
Our Guru Tsem Rinpoche had prepares all of us to meet with the inevitable, which is our own death. Rinpoche had been teaching us all these while. No matter whom we meet in life, all situations eventually lead to separation and all relationships will end via death. In-fact our guru’s parinirvana is actually a final experiential teaching on death and impermanence for all of us. Hence it is important for us to immerse ourselves fully into each and every moment of life in learning and practicing Dharma. And following all advices and instructions of our Guru and fulfil what not completed. Instead of feeling lost we should somehow to devoting oneself entirely especially in fulfilling all of our guru’s wishes and continue his work nor matter what comes along. Reading this post had me realised there ‘s indeed quite a long way to go , thanks to all those involved especially senior student and so forth. May all of us play a part to be involved as a team then. We should help when necessary and encourage people coming into Dharma joining the centre and its activities. This post tells us all , a good and detailed read.
Thank you Pastor David for this sharing, had me having a good thoughts.
Dear Sir, by chance seen his you-tube regards to “The Dying Process” and lead to this blog. Thought have found my Guru. Am now deeply sadden by his passing on. May he rest in peace.
Thank you P. David for your effort in writing this beautiful, detailed outlined of guidance and uplifting piece of article. Thank you again!
Thank you for writing this article, Pastor David.
This is an ecellent and beneficial article Pastor David. It touches all the correct spots and covers all areas.
This a a very meaningful write up and wonderful reminder for all of us who wish to be forever close with Rinpoche is to follow through with Rinpoche’s words and instructions. I still keep Rinpoche’s last words to me in my mobile notepad and also try to prioritize my timetable on sticky note in front of my monitor and try to follow through daily from Mon- Sun. I sincerely hope that all dharma members and friends would buck up and take their practice seriously and do more dharma work to bring Rinpoche’s incarnation back soon. Thank you very much Rinpoche and Pastor David for this great write up.😘👍🙏👏
Wonderful reminders Pastor David – may all the dharmic goals of Rinpoche, Kechara and disciples associated with Tsem Rinpoche come to fruition. May we meet and learn from you again Rinpoche.