Being there for kids the right way…
Dear everyone,
I was in the car a few weeks back driving to KFR to meet dharma kids and I was sharing some thoughts. In the video I explain what my thoughts are. I took the video with my cell phone.
Well, wherever I am I will take care of children when I can and nurture them to be the best they can be and spiritual too. Kind and spiritual people impacted me greatly when I was a kid and I remember those people fondly now. Everything we do leaves an imprint in children. They are important for us to be the best we can be too.
Tsem Rinpoche
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Get involved with Vajrayogini Stupa at KFR
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I found a place for Kechara Village!
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Nurturing children with Dharma is very important. Parents must
also show good example to their children so that they become better person when they grow up.
It is every parents’ hope that their children grow up to be good and caring adults. Thank you very much for good article
1984 Los Angeles-Left to right: Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen, His Holiness Kyabje Zong Rinpoche, monk assistant to Zong Rinpoche and the 18-year-old Tsem Rinpoche prior to ordination. Read more- https://www.tsemrinpoche.com/tsem-tulku-rinpoche/category/me
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A poem inspired by seeing a picture of my teacher, Kyabje Zong Rinpoche…
In the sport of correct views,
all that is correct is just a view,
without permanence or substance.
As long as we hold onto views,
our sufferings are gathered
to be experienced without end.
Without the strong methods of emptiness
and compassion, bereft of merit,
we sink deeper without respite.
To arise from this samsara is but
a dreamscape on the deluded mind.
Therefore seek the guru, who confers the yidam,
hold your vows and fixate on liberation
free of new creations. Free of new experiences as
there are none.
~ Tsem Rinpoche
Composed in Tsem Ladrang, Kuala Lumpur on July 7, 2014
I was walking past a second hand shop on Western Ave selling old things. They had a Japanese-style clay Buddha which was beige in colour on the floor, holding the door open. I thought the shopkeeper would collect a lot of negative karma without knowing if he kept such a holy item on the floor as a doorstop. So I went in to talk to him, but he didn’t look like he wanted to talk or that he even cared. So I asked him the price and he said US$5. I purchased it so he did not collect more negative karma. I was 17 years old and that was in 1982.
I escorted my new Buddha home and washed it lightly and wiped it. I placed it on my altar and was happy with the Buddha. I would do my meditations, prayers, sadhanas, mantras and prostrations in front of this shrine daily. When I left for India in 1987, I could not bring this Buddha along and gave it to a friend. It was a nice size and I made offerings to this Buddha for many years in Los Angeles. In front of the Buddha I placed His Holiness the Dalai Lama’s photo. I remember I was so relieved that the price was affordable. But US$5 that time was still expensive for me but worth it I thought. But I was happy to have brought the Buddha home. Tsem Rinpoche
https://www.tsemrinpoche.com
Tsem Rinpoche at Kechara Forest Retreat, Bentong, Malaysia
Dear Rinpoche,
I grew up with priests and nuns most of the times until I entered my university. I have very good impressions on priests and nuns too. They were so friendly and helpful. I still remember one of the priests who came from Hong Kong and he was being stationed here in Malaysia. His name was Fr. Su. I remember how we (members of the youth group) used to help him around when he wanted to start the Mass, setting up altar for prayers at people’s house, at funerals, organised camps and etc. We used to help him to collect donations as he wanted to go back to his hometown once a year but the airfare was expensive at that time and plus he wanted to save up for his parents, relatives and etc back in Hong Kong. From this, I learnt filial piety. In essence, he was so kind to leave his hometown just to spread Jesus’s teachings to us as at that time in Malaysia as we were short of Chinese ethnic priests. He spent years in monastery to study and yet being stationed so faraway from his home. On the other hand, there were few nuns as well and I’ve been to nun’s chapel for special prayers (which were strictly for them). So many other sweet memories I had with them.
Now that I have my kids on my own, I wish they could experience what I’ve been through. Previously, I was worried on how I can prepare my children spiritually as they clearly did not exhibit any interest in spirituality at all (from my perception at that moment). Thanks to Rinpoche who reminded me (as parent) that I am the best example for my children. Both my husband and I often invited them to do some Dharma and we will show them how we should carry ourselves well. Both of us might not be the perfect examples, however thanks to Rinpoche, the blog, and those people around us to guide us along the way. As of now, I can clearly see the changes in my children. They have been praying at night before they sleep, they will know whom to propitiate when they are in doubt or got frightened, more caring in nature, we can talk, share and discuss things more openly and maturely unlike those days where the discussions were tense and most of the times ended up in cold war. Thanks to my partner as well, as I can see the changes from both of us too, over the time. Life is not a bed of roses but clearly we managed to cut some thorns and squeeze our way along the path.
Thank you Rinpoche
Hello, I’m a mother of two kids, & I’m really trying my best to find answers while practising dharma, unfortunately I’m not living in a Buddhist country or have any (sangha community near me),But hopefully this will change soon. Thanks to your kindness Tsem Rinpoche & many other teachers, you are really helping people like me move forward & over come many difficulties! So I would love to say thank you so much!? i would also like to ask how we can inspire our young kids to practice? & how we can introduce discipline? Its not easy for young kids?any thoughts? Thank you again!?
Children are like sponges that absorb liquids rapidly. Without a proper control, the children will habituate themselves with wrong views, moral values and conduct. These will be harmful for their development. There is no other better time to train the children in Dharma. It is the children’s great good fortunes to meet Rinpoche at such young age. Through Rinpoche’s meticulous care, love and guidance, some of these kids here have grown up to be responsible and matured young adults. It is relatively easier to inculcate good moral values and conduct in these children when they are still young than when they are grown-ups.
Thank You Rinpoche for showing us the importance of nurturing the children in order to prepare them for adulthood.
常常都说佛法是给小孩最好的礼物。现今的父母大多是双薪家庭对小孩 都疏 于管教，而且新世纪网路文化影响深远。渐渐孩子们都不听话。這是非常嚴重的問題。所以，網路接觸多了，他們懂得的知識超過父母、老師，你說一句，他會說十句。雖然他們懂得很多、看得很多、聽得很多，但是沒有智慧去判斷是非、利害。
所以学佛目的就是要遵纪守法，这很重要。这些孩子都是国家的栋梁，他们以后能够实实在在做事的好孩子，希望他们清廉，知道一个人不能做坏事，做坏事有报应。要尽忠职守，做什么事情都要认真，上要孝敬父母，对待师长，下要关心别人，做一个能够让别人尊敬的人。而不是充满着对世俗情怀的一种恨。这样以后这些孩子出来都是正能量，对世界和平，和对民族的责任心会大大的有所帮助。
谢谢尊贵仁波切分享
这班小孩非常幸运而且也有很好的福报。
可以得到尊贵的Rinpoche 加持，和教导,用佛法来教育孩子。把佛法的种子，种植在孩子。
孩子还小时，以简单的方式来灌输佛法知识给孩子们，建立一个更美好的世界。
让孩子们明白，生活除了，物质以外，还有学习如何利益他。
只有透过佛法的教育他，让他们明白许多事实的真像，希望孩子在成长变得更好。
仁波切对于小孩的慈悲与爱犹如浩瀚大海的一盏明灯，仁波切亲自教育他们和传授佛陀教法，期望把佛种子填满他们的心识，为了要他们在未来成为一位正能量的人，有正面的思想和精神，那么未来的成长才不至于成为迷途羔羊。
拥有一位金刚上师亲身教导佛陀教诲是何等的幸运，那是直接的加持。
仁波切对于孩童的身心灵教育是非常重视的，仁波切常常劝勉父母要以身作则，才能把孩子们教育的好。
仁波切时常亲自出游去购买礼物送给他常见或不常见的孩子。仁波切甚至也会送礼物给一些他不认识或没有见过的孩童，而且那些礼物都是仁波切亲自挑选的。完全都不假手于人。
我在仁波切身上看到的是一位慈悲的母亲一视同仁的对待所有的孩子，都把最好和殊胜的都给予他们。
这是仁波切的善解方式把佛法容入在他们的心田里，也让他们可以快速的把佛法印记种下。
感谢仁波切对孩子们的付出与的身教。
The best gift for the children is the gift of Dharma, Dharma enriches the mind and soul of the children. Because in the process of growing up, they can easily be influenced by their peers, surrounding and even family members.
Rinpoche providing fundamental of moral, Dharma and integrity into the mind of the children, enriching them with positivity, love, care and compassion.
Rinpoche loves children and it’s not surprising to see Rinpoche spending quality time nurturing them. They are such a lucky bunch of children to be so close to Rinpoche and learning the Dharma and be guided on their spiritual path.
I didn’t have the good karma to be able to meet any Sangha when I was younger but I thank my lucky stars (maybe) that I am in the right path now and to be a student of Rinpoche.
Nurturing children with Dharma is very important. Parents must
also show good example to their children so that they become better person when they grow up.
Thank you Rinpoche for being a shining example to the kids.
Jill Yam
Dear Rinpoche,
Thank you for sharing this advice here. Having kids is a huge load is responsibility. We have to take care of their welfare physically, mentally as well as spirituality. most parents focuses on their kids physically but they forget about mentally and most importantly is spiritually. Raising a healthy and strong kid is not hard, but raising a mentally and spiritually strong kid is hard. However, if the kid is being groomed mentally and spiritually, they will grow up to be much better people and much prepared for the chaos in the adulthood.
On the other hand, planting dharmic seeds for the kid as early as possible is very beneficial for them as they grow up. The they grow up, dharma will grow inside of them too. That is the best gift any parents can give their kid in any means.
Humbly,
Chris Chong
After listening to this I really wished I had met Rinpoche at a very young age. I am sure it would have changed a lot of my views and given me a strong impression. Yes these kids are definitely very very fortunate to have the path cross with Rinpoche and for Rinpoche to be talk to them and give them a great purpose in their life! Wow, how many kids get to meet a real Lama, Guru, Buddha? It’s true, whatever we as adults do, children are very smart and they are very aware, they may act dumb but they know, they copy it, they feel it and they know when you don’t walk the talk. So it is true, it is very important that we nurture them the right way and be living examples of what we teach them, otherwise they are not going to listen or respect. I know this, cos I was a kid too and did this to my parents especially when they break their promises or don’t act right.
We should never underestimate children and the children these days learn a lot faster since information are so easily and readily available. My niece is a perfect example of this, she’s only 8 and is always surprising me with what she comprehends. Whenever I see her, I try to instil some Dharma values in her. Really hope she will grow up with some Dharma because that will definitely benefit her when she grows up!
What Rinpoche has said is very true. It is because of the time that I have spent with Rinpoche while Rinpoche was in Singapore that is what influenced me to practice more Dharma. Constantly teaching me values in ways that I am able to accept very easily. Thank you Rinpoche for always spending time with little monsters like me to nurture us into a better person.
Rejoice that these kids have good merits/karma to learn and start practising the Dharma from such a young age. Kids do learn from example or role model, and having Rinpoche to be the role model, what have they done in their past lives to collect such good merits? Hope that they will see this as a precious opportunity to sincerely learn and practice the Dharma, pray that they will go all the way through to benefit others with what they’ve learnt. Rejoice!
I see so many people have kids for the wrong reasons… some are to follow the request of their family and society, some to have it to continue their family business, some have them thinking that their kids will take care of them when they are old, some is out of no choice, and many more weird, personally attachment reasons. And most of the people I come across now who have had kids regrets having them in the first place. Wow! Then why did you bother having them in the first place? And they always say because I did not know better and I did not have “Dharma”. This proves to me that perhaps 90% of people have kids for all the wrong reasons and that is probably why children are spoil, neglected or abandoned.
If we have chosen the path to have kids, we must realise this is another being we are bring up and bring in to the world. How we nurture them is our responsibility of how they will end up in the future. Kids these days are smarter and they learn way much faster then before due to the internet and media available…hence it is so very important to induce morals, values and discipline and spirituality in to their lives so that they do not end up becoming useless in life. Why does Rinpoche put extra attention to kids… simple… they will be the ones to take over after we are gone… they will be us now, they will be the future leaders or failures… up to how we nurture them. So they are our “future”. Nurturing them also helps us control ourselves, watch ourselves to act and be better adults who will set examples. Kids are not dump as I mentioned because they are quick to observe a hypocrite and an adult who walks the talk. Hence like what Rinpoche says “Everything we do leaves an imprint in children. They are important for us to be the best we can be too.”
谢谢仁波切的教导。 如果每个小孩都学习佛法，那世界就和平了。现在的孩子幸福很多，有手提电话，有电脑，有车等等。所以从小就应该灌输给小孩 “没有一样东西是免费的” ，不要贪小便宜，不要太沉迷于物质，要帮助需要的人。
Yes, using the right way to raise the kids are so so so important, we must know how to teach them and know what to teach them that will benefit them the most when they grow up, not to make them an extension of our selfishness.
When we teach them what is right, what is wrong, we must also show them example, our action is the biggest and most powerful example to them, if we don’t do as what we say, they will not respect us anymore and worse still, they will learn the hypocrisy from us.
Rinpoche always knows how to guide them in the right way, thank you Rinpoche for the teachings.
I first met Rinpoche when I was around 8-9 years old. At that time, Kechara Paradise did not even exist (the one on the 2nd floor in SS2).
When I was around 13 years old, Kechara House had one class only which was held every Sunday, and was called Manjushri Class. Both adults and a few kids (children of the parents attending the class) would join. Although, the kids would sit in the store room which was located next to the kitchen and play.
There was no Lam Rim class, Manjushri Kid’s Class or the other various puja sessions that Kechara now has.
The Kechara kids are now very lucky to have such close contact with Rinpoche. They are even more lucky that they have a found something good to be passionate about, which is the Animal Befrienders Coalition (ABC).
It’s amazing how Rinpoche can really give people from all walks of life a purpose in life, and a meaningful and worthwhile one too.
For those who haven’t yet, do support the ABC’s on Facebook! 🙂
http://www.facebook.com/AnimalBefriendersCoalition?fref=ts
Hi Jean Mei,
Wow.. you were so lucky to meet Rinpoche so young. Sean met Rinpoche when he was 7, and Rinpoche and Kechara has been an integral part of his life since then. He used to spend his school holidays at my office at Kechara Media & Publications and now he comes to Haven. He is very fortunate to be involved in ABC and the blog team.. thank you for guiding him in the blog team and i hope he will grow up to be as confident and independent as you! 🙂
With Rinpoche as his Guru, i have no doubt that Sean will develop to be the best that he can be. Thank you Rinpoche for Rinpoche’s kindness for Sean and the rest of the Dharma kids!
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we had fun that night and we played the ring game one time you find thering is 5 candles it was very fun!!!!
There weren’t that many people who took an interest in kids besides one;s parents and for my cousin who was much older than I her care and concern for me was most touching and I still remember her kindness till today and appreciate the time I spend with her. The kids have much to rejoice to spend time with a high lama like RInpoche who can give them dharma at their level. How fortunate!
这群小孩确实很有福报得到仁波切的照顾以及教育。仁波切很善巧的运用各种方式去教育他们，好让他们在年幼时期得到很多的印记和种下佛种子。
我相信往后这班小孩会循规蹈矩的长大，当他们拥有了佛法知识对他们在往后处理问题会有很大的帮助。
仁波切的付出与关爱是孩子们走向正道的一扇门。
Kids are our future. As parents, we need to take responsibility to impart right values in them. We should set a good example and have good qualities so that we can impart that to our children.
These kids are so fortunate to receive dharma at such young age. Instead of playing video games, they went for an outing and spent their time learning dharma from Rinpoche in a light, fun and easy way.
The children were very blessed to have Rinpoche spending time with them and having fun. In these time and technology our children are coming across so many information and influences, good and bad. It is every parents’ hope that their children grow up to be good and caring adults. When they are far away from their parents, it is very important they can differentiate and decide what is good and not do things that may harm themselves and others. Thank you Rinpoche for taking time from your busy schedule to spend time with the children so that they have an idea of what being kind and caring is all about.
Planting good imprints in the minds of people when they are kids is so important, because that is their most impressionable age. When they grow up and look back they will remember those adults( a Sangha member, parents or friends) who have spent time with them.When adults take time to be with them, let them have fun and care and love,this will sow positive imprints. Even more so when these adults embody those good qualities of care, love and compassion. When the kids recall all this in their own adult years, it will trigger off these imprints and have a positive impact on them.
Yes, as Rinpoche says, when it’s a member of the Sangha as the adult that shows them this love and care, there will be spirituality and the Dharma included as an important component. The impact and influence and the positive imprint will be a huge one.
These children, on a trip to the Kechara Forest Retreat,are so lucky to have this outing with Rinpoche!
Thank you for this advice Rinpoche. My son has become a good reminder on integrity, because if I say I’ll take him somewhere he says ‘remember to keep you promise mommy’, very cute. Found this interesting article raising our children by Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche
http://shambhalatimes.org/2009/03/20/raising-our-children-sharing-our-world/
Hi Honourable Rinpoche, today I am very honoured because you posted 2 videos on my facebook. Thanks. Actually I got to know you through your KMP staff Abby Foo. She is my niece. I was brought around by her 3 weeks ago and I really respect Rinpoche for doing such a good job in just a few years. I have listened to Why Malaysia and Imprint and the Dharma talks are very inspiring. This is my first time getting to know a Tibetan Teacher, and I think you are a great teacher. As a Tzu Chi member, I do a lot of home visits to help the needy, pay visits to hospital to care for the sick and also recycling activities. So I have been putting off my own inner cultivation for a while and I yearn for Dharma Knowledges. Rinpoche’s talks and life stories really has put an impact on me and browsing your blog has given me a lot of Dharma knowledges. One more thing that touched me is your love to animal and this means your love is for all beings. Thanks to Rinpoche again. Hopefully I would be able to really learn from Rinpoche and be a better person……
Check out the update on Rinpoche spending time with the children in KFR. They had a fun with Dharma.
http://retreat.kechara.com/news/17th-update-29-may-2012-rinpoche-with-kechara-children-at-kfr/
Having the kids going outing with Rinpoche is a great blessing. Rinpoche is so compassionate to show, teach and plant an imprint to the kids for their spiritual growth. The kids is our future and for them to learn and put dharma in practice at very young age is the greatest thing we ever one them to do. Dharma will be their pillar when they fall, will be their guide when they confuse and their answer when they are at the crossroad.
It’s also important for the parents to show good example to the young want because we are what they see and what they will learn from at home. We have to show responsibility, honesty & integrity. We have to act like one and in order to show them how to become one. That’s why the parents are important to practice dharma too in order to convince the kids that dharma is good. We don’t only just bring them to the centre but we together do dharma with them and show them. They see the parents put their time, effort and consistency so they young one will learn up and understand that it’s a good thing that my parents are working on.
Thank you Rinpoche for the love that Rinpoche showered to all the young one and I believe the kids enjoy themselves very much.
Young ones are like dry sponges that will and can absorb anything they come across with no biasness or prejudices that comes with age. The biggest fear of becoming a parent for (me) is… am I able to create a Right Impression on them with the proper values… to be a decent human. It warms my heart to see Rinpoche giving his precious time to these kids, talking / laughing with them, imparting the dharma in his unique but effective way… They will definately gain positive experiences / lasting imprints from this one experience with Rinpoch…
Most kids I knew grew up, looking up to someone in their lives as a role model / hero but ended up dissapointed when they realise that their role model is just another “phony… with self serving agendas”… how different it would be for them if there was someone that is the “real deal”… someone genuinly selfless and giving….
听了仁波切的一番感言让我联想到我们小的时候多么的顽皮，在很多时候我们的言行举止却代表了我们内心的想法。小孩是未来社会的主人翁，父母亲除了要灌输真确的教导之外更要为孩子们灌输佛法，让佛法的种子流传在孩子的心中。希望克切拉禅修林能带给孩子们更多学习的机会。
有很多的父母，都很担心孩子们的前途，很担心他们的将来，不知道他们会不会过得幸福。。。。等等的问题。在还没有遇到佛法以前，我也跟很多的父母一样，总是为我的孩子担心，但是现在，当我遇到仁波切和克切拉以后，我觉得只要将教育以及佛法得知识留给他们，那就是他们这一生中最好的礼物，因为，只有透过佛法的教育，才能让我们的孩子得到全面性的保护，让他们明白许多事实的真像，那么他们就不会因为缺乏智慧而不断的犯错，
Kids will always copying the adults and act like them during their growing years. Its very fortunate when our children are taught dharma, and have the fortunate to learn dharma from a great master. So the parents please value these opportunities, and hopefully our kids will grow up well!
Thank you Rinpoche for implanting dharma to the future leaders. They are the very lucky kids instead of playing video games at home but were learning dharma directly from Rinpoche. Therefore they can understand and avoid being attracted to meaningless attachments even before they get polluted in the society during their growing period. Very meaningful and thoughtful session.
Good luck kids and thank you Rinpoche.
Take good care.
Thank you, dear Rinpoche for talking to the kids in a language that they can understand. Most adults either use harsh words to control screaming children all the time or they assume that kids don’t know better. Some couples have children because it is just part of the plan. Career – Marriage – Family. Not realizing that bringing a life into this world is a commitment and responsibility that goes beyond tradition and reproducing heirs.
Sometimes it freaked me that how many kids actually complain about their parents but they turned out just like them. How many actually wanted to be like their parents and looked up to them as their role models get disappointed later in their lives because the children watched the actions of the parents. Parents might think that they might be young and naive without much knowledge, however imprints were planted and some kids have really good memory about their childhood.
It is so important for kids to have a good role model for the children these days. Because the world today is teaching the kids to chase after nothing but material stuff. This is what the world is promoting. If parents set that as their benchmark of achievement, it will ruin the kids now and their future because this is what you taught them to be.
Just like what Rinpoche said, kids still need education, work, or maybe get married someday whatever they choose their life to be. But inject a little subject called spirituality into their lives when their young. So when they grow older, they know at least the fundamental of a human’s life is what about. Because they don’t teach that in school or university.
Rinpoche took the time to meet these young dharma kids, gave them teachings, eat with them, prayers, play games and watch movie… it was such a fun but education night for the nights. I am sure this very night planted some really important imprints in their mind. So when they grow older they will go :”Oh I remember this monk said this to me before…” It will help them when they are facing problems later in life.
What we teach our children today, will have great impact to the world in the future. It is them that will determine the future of our country. Hence, instilling good qualities and teachings to our children is the key to a better future. Having someone they respect and look up to as good example gives will point them in the right direction, if and when they get lost along the way in the future.
Rinpoche is very kind to have organized this fun outing with the kids. They must have enjoyed it really much. I wish I was there too…. Rinpoche is right, we should start planting good seeds and show good examples to our children for when they grow up, they are the ones who will continue on to educate their next generation.. If we don’t do it well, we are setting up for our next generation to fail.
Joe
感謝RINPOCHE 分享這一個短片.
孩子都是會以父母為榜樣,所以父母在日常的言行舉止中必須”里外合一”.父母必須給于孩子的教導也是”內外兼備”. 外在的我們必須供給他們好的教育,內在的我們必須讓他們學佛法.我相信雙管齊下,孩子們一定能夠成為一個更好的人!!我更確定佛法能夠讓孩子們成為一個能利益他人的人!!
This is very true and i totally agreed that everything we do leaves an imprint in children. Whether you want them to turn into a horrible human or a good human in the future. The main thing is the adult’s behaviour is direct reflected to the children. So watch what you said and what you do in front of them, because they are observing and watching!
Teaching children is not like what they ask for, we have to give, this is not right. We’ve to guide them in a proper way until they grown up such like when they start working then they can look after themselves.
Thinking back in the days with what we do with my parents, I find myself carrying out similar habits when I had grown. They were bad habits that took years to shake off and some already have.
We re-learned and re-habituate if we allow ourselves that in later years. Its the same with children. They do copy their parents habituation indirectly. Therefore instilling positive dharma imprints into their mind, like meeting and talking with a lama or Guru does have that effect. These children will remember this experience now and in future. This is important.
This group is rather fortunate to spend precious time with Tsem Rinpoche. May other children will have the same opportunity as well in the future to spend time with their lama.
Many parents come to Kechara and told me they cannot come to center because of the kids. They not dare to bring kids along because they scared the kids will make noise and disturb others.
Let’s me share with all of you, actually not really. Through my experiences children like to visit center and some of them even learn how to chant and mundra. Yes, it is true the first beginning some of them are make noise, but I noticed after awhile and when the parents talked to them again and again, they become more discipline. After I listened what Rinpoche mentioned in the video it is very important parents need to bring their come to center very often. Make them close with Three Jewel.
When we bring up our children along the right path, this provides a strong foundation for them to grow up to be stable and balanced adults. Definition of “right path” varies from each parent based on their own upbringing and perception. So it is important that we as parents especially if we have our Guru to guide and teach us apply his teachings to our life. Then we can be good models for our children to follow. Those kids were so blessed to have the outing with Rinpoche. An outing of fun and laughter infused with Dharma and puja. It will have a lasting impression on them which they can carry to their adulthood.
“What’s the best things that you ever had in you life?” I like to ask this question. Many people answered that how many kids they have, how adorable they are and etc. Having kids is very easy but teaching them we need patience for sure (they all are monsters), we need to be skillful (they are extremely smart and fast), some times we need to be firm (which i have like near zero) to discipline them, must always be kind (they turn soft when they know you are kind to them.) and of course LOVE. They need a lot of love.
Just like what Rinpoche did is showing them how Rinpoche loves them and from there they learn how to love others too. When they were loved, they feel good and hence they will want to give love too. Rinpoche is very skillful with children. Rinpoche will be someone they adored and remembered when they grown up. If one day when they were hurt and when they needed someone, they will think of Rinpoche.
Sometimes it freak me up that how many kids actually complain about their parents but they turned out just like them. How many actually wanted to be like their parents and looked up to them as their role models get disappointed later in their lives because the children watched the actions of the parents. Parents might think that they might be young and naive without much knowledge, however imprints were planted and some kids have really good memory about their childhood.
It is so important for kids to have a good role model for the children these days. Because the world today is teaching the kids to chase after nothing but material stuff. This is what the world is promoting. If parents set that as their benchmark of achievement, it will ruin the kids now and their future because this is what you taught them to be.
Just like what Rinpoche said, kids still need education, work, or maybe get married someday whatever they choose their life to be. But inject a little subject called spirituality into their lives when their young. So when they grow older, they know at least the fundamental of a human’s life is what about. Because they don’t teach that in school or university.
Rinpoche took the time to meet these young dharma kids, gave them teachings, eat with them, prayers, play games and watch movie… it was such a fun but education night for the nights. I am sure this very night planted some really important imprints in their mind. So when they grow older they will go :”Oh I remember this monk said this to me before…” It will help them when they are facing problems later in life.
当我听了师父的这一番话，我想起妈妈如何教导我长大！ ：-） 每当我闯祸是妈妈都会在第一时间出来为我烹煮一顿美味的 “ 藤条焖猪肉”， 每次都打在我身，痛在她心！每当看到妈妈心疼， 我就会学乖一次那么多！
我的家庭教育就是打还有骂！ 但是现在的 “金菠萝” 那里可以打与骂呢？ 而且， 父母也很少时间在家， 孩子犯了什么都不知道！
我认同，怎么样的父母，就有怎么样的孩子！哈哈， 我们可以 blame 是基因问题。 但是家人，就是每天他们对的最多！不像父母，哈哈哈。。。。。 我知道像谁！
猜猜看！！ 就是每天为他们准备食物， 开门关门的 kakak 啊！
生小孩容易，抚养成人难，教育更难！
克切拉的小朋友， 福报正好！有一位那么贴心的喇嘛深深爱护着！ 可以把佛法知识当成他们成长中的维他命！
健康快乐！
谢谢仁波切！！
if we wishing our children can be growing up in good quality person, we as a parent need to set good example to them as we are the close modal for them to learn.i strongly belive dharma is the best gift for the children whoch is valuable for the future life.
Parenting in a right way is very, very important… Rinpoche is very true, being a parents, is not just teaching them ABC. And we adult are a sample for children.
How is the world and the society to be like in future, that is all depend on the children that we have teach. Very important.
Thank You Rinpoche. xxx
小孩学佛法，是很好，有法佛知识孩子，确保他们变得更好，孩子还小的时候，父母就要给与小孩正确的佛法教学。
把佛法的种子，种植在孩子们心中，以最简单的方式来灌输正确的态度给孩子，，为孩子们建立一个更美好的世界。
小孩子就像一张白纸，我们在白纸上写了一些字，不对了！就算擦掉，但是白纸，还是留下笔印。所以当大人做过了什么，小孩就会有样学样的。我们该曾小孩还小的时候，给与小孩正确的佛法教学，因为学佛的小孩，坏不到那里去的。
The trip to Chamang KFR gifted from Rinpoche to Kechara kids is such a kind and loving gesture for which I am most grateful, as 2 of the kids are my grandchildren.
My heart rejoices just thinking how wonderful it is for Julien and Lucas and their Dharma friends to be so fortunate to have the Dharma at such a young age.
My mind now drift to the previous post on how Mrs. Karen Klein was bullied and how unkind the kids were. How I wish that the Dharma can be every where so that people will live more virtuously and create a better society where care for each and every sentient being prevails. HOW I WISH!!!!
Never just wish but put into action whatever is needed for the Dharma to grow and I will.
Thank you so much RINPPOCHE.I was very happy on that day RINPOCHE brought us to KFR.I enjoyed the day with RINPOCHE and my friends.
Part of the lyrics of “Greatest Love of All”;
“I believe the children are our future
Teach them well and let them lead the way
Show them all the beauty they possess inside
Give them a sense of pride to make it easier
Let the children’s laughter remind us how we used to be
Everybody’s searching for a hero
People need someone to look up to
I never found anyone who fulfilled my needs
A lonely place to be
So I learned to depend on me………”
Rinpoche is our Hero. Someone we look up to. Someone who fulfill our needs, everyone’s needs! Some we can depend on as refuge.
Oh, and what Rinpoche said about sangha making a good impression on kids when they are younger…totally worked for us three Khong monsters Rinpoche, thank you! 😀
As Rinpoche said in this video, the key to parenting is to lead by example. Many parents seek Rinpoche’s help when their children become monsters as they grow older. They think that their children will listen to Rinpoche although it’s the first time they meet Rinpoche. Very illogical! Why would the children listen to a stranger like Rinpoche?
Rinpoche would give advice to the parents instead. The parents will need to change themselves and embody the qualities they wish to impart to their children. So the sooner the parents transform for the better, the sooner they’ll see their children transform as well.
I have to say, my parents were always there for me in the right way. They were strict but fair, and never discouraged my siblings and I – even when I said for years that I wanted to be a marine biologist, my parents didn’t laugh (even if they did tease me!). They took me to look at schools that offered the course, encouraged me to learn about dolphins, let me go diving, took me on holidays to swim with dolphins, etc. They always kept their promises to us, and encouraged us to get involved in activities that help others.
No matter how tough things got at home, my parents also never let it show. If they argued with one another, they never dragged their kids into it. If they were less financially solvent, they never let us worry. In fact, they would give up their pleasures and their enjoyments so us kids would never suspect anything was wrong.
I respect my parents so much today because they never put any of their expectations on me, and just let me figure out who I wanted to be. What Rinpoche said about how kids think that they want to be certain adults, I definitely had that thought when I was younger – even when I was very young, I used to tell anyone who would listen that if I could be half the people my parents are, I’d be very happy.
So adults shouldn’t think that their kids aren’t perceptive, and are not soaking up everything from their environment, good or bad. Kids ARE aware and kids ARE watching, and so it’s extremely important for adults to present the right lessons for the younger generation to learn.
Thanks Rinpoche for bring Kechara to beautiful Malaysia that can let parents connected and learn Dharma. Some of their kids also may learn Dharma here. As many testimonies showed, they and their kids are act in the right way, good attitude, live in harmony after learn Dharma.
Just imaging, if we got more people to learn and practice Dharma now the next generation will be more peace and harmony and sure they will heading for better life.
Thanks Rinpoche for sharing the info.
When i was kid, there is only 2 type of monk in my head, 1 is kung fu monk like jet li in shaolin movie, they always practice kung fu and fight, another type is prayer monk, they always chanting… chanting and chanting.
Having a Dharma talk to the kid is wonderful and Rinpoche has definitely planted in them Dharma seeds.
Kids are the future.If we want the world to be a better place than when we found it , we need to take responsibility to ensure we inculcate the correct values in them.It means we have to have those qualities ourselves and live it.The Chamang kids are so fortunate they received advice from Rinpoche not as a high monk but as their friendly playful spiritual father.I wished I had talked to my children , who are all adults now , like that when they were younger. For sure they would be even better persons and have spiritual seeds planted earlier.
Parents must not confuse kids whereby words and actions are not match, kids are very smart and they pick up very fast if we adults do not WALK THE TALK. The 16 minutes video, Rinpoche stressed to embody dharma and good qualities within our kids is very important, this is truly a great sharing to all of us.
This is such a casual, fun and yet powerful teaching by Rinpoche. I am touched by how Rinpoche offers himself so freely to the kids and everyone else as a good friend and a teacher. So many good points made by Rinpoche in the video. Basic points that are so important.
Even with a rough and temporary structure Rinpoche is already putting it to an extremely good use and I can see even more clearly now the great importance of having the full set up so that Rinpoche can do much more and to for even more people.
I am glad I took 16 minutes to watch the video. Made me realise how important it is for us and the future generations to have Rinpoche and to have facilities like KFR. This is too precious to forget.
You have to tell the truth because it feels good…. This is my policy with my kids. My kids have proven to me that never underestimate their intelligence and how aware they are of what is going on. My older sons Julien and Lucas were with Rinpoche on this day in Chamang. They are really blessed to have Rinpoche teaching them Dharma at their young age. They had a wonderful time with Rinpoche. They were all excited when they got home. Rinpoche has definitely planted in them Dharma seeds. Children are impressionable and to have a Lama in their lives is truly a gift. Thank you Rinpoche for spending time with our kids.
Thank you Rinpoche for taking our kids to KFR and spend quality time with them.
What Rinpoche said about adults/parents leave deep impact on the children and mould them into what they will become is so true.
Rinpoche is playful and has a way to loosen the kids up and at the same time give them valuable dharmic imprints without stuffing “religious” infor down their throats. Children can see that Rinpoche embodies all the good qualities he talks about and they learn directly and quickly from Rinpoche’s own actions.
As adults or parents , What we say and what we do must be matched, be responsible to our kids!
Do what Rinpoche has always advice, “Show them that nothing for free, tell the truth all the time”
do not influence them with bad examples. Imprints in their minds, put some dharma in their life is so important, put some spirituality into their mind.in short, to be WALK THE TALK and be a responsible adult/parent before its too late.
This is a great sharing on parenting and how to treat kids in general. As whatever we do, we will leave imprint to them, we should always be the best example for them. Teach them hard work counts, nothing is free, material things is not the way to bring us lasting happiness, to tell the truth, etc. Important is to teach them Dharma as it will help them in the long run!I will work hard to be the example for them to follow as they are important for me. Thank you Rinpoche for the teaching.
Good parental guide is very important for our kids. We should embody the qualities we want our kids have. Our kids learn these good or bad qualities from us. It is the good impression and imprints that include spirituality counts so they will be alright when they grow up.
In this part of the world, there are many fake Sanghas who go around to cheat people. I grow up having a lot of doubts when seeing Sanghas and tend to question if they are genuine.
As Rinpoche said, when Rinpoche makes time to spend with the kids, it will plant the imprint in the kids mind that the Sangha is indeed real and compassionate, and with these doubts removed, Dharma can be absorbed much easily. I think Rinpoche is absolute spot on again.
Also, one of the most important ingredient for kids to grow up with humane is the the parents. If parents only TALK Dharma but never DO Dharma, by treating the people well, by being kind to people and animals, be giving and generous, serve others, etc, kids will grow up with a lot of doubts and wondering why people don’t do what they said, and this can be very damaging to kids.
We can build a better world by instilling the correct attitudes in our kids, and the easiest way to do it, is us parents WALK THE TALK!