(By Tsem Rinpoche)

Dear friends around the world,

I would like to share a teaching on reinforcing our delusions. It will help you understand how we trick ourselves into being trapped in samsara (our own sufferings) and how our excuses are actually a cover for us to further indulge in our cravings. This teaching also reveals how merits and karma are gathered, the circumstances under which merit and karma are collected, the difference between merit and karma, and if we’re collecting positive or negative karma.

I sincerely recommend this article to everyone interested in making a change in their lives. Please read this and let me know what you’ve realized… Do you create more delusions, or do you try to cut your delusions on a daily basis? If you are creating more delusions than cutting off your delusions, there are antidotes to it: Dharma work with the correct motivation and merits.

I hope this article will help and benefit you so that you may benefit your loved ones and others in turn.

Tsem Rinpoche

Reinforcement

A Teaching on Creating or Cutting Through Delusions

In whatever we’re doing, it’s easy to start feeling like we’re hamsters running on a wheel. Our every day becomes busy and exhausting, but at the end of a long day, running that wheel, we feel like it amounts to not very much at all. We go round and round in a vicious cycle.

Then, we might try to get out of the cycle by searching for something spiritual – the promise of liberation and freedom. When we’re in it, we soon begin to feel that we have become a part of another trap and we don’t really know what it brings us to. We lose sight of that big thing they call Enlightenment or begin to feel like it’s just too far away to be a real possibility anymore. Round and round we go…

Either way, you’re getting yourself into a trap. That’s what it is after all – samsara’s just a big giant hole we’ve gotten ourselves into, and as long as we’re here, we’re going to find ourselves stuck at some point. So if you’re going to have to choose a trap, it may as well be the one that has an outlet, a secret passageway that can help you get out of the maze and into freedom – or the beginning of it anyway.

And what does it mean to “feel trapped” anyway? Surely, as Buddhists, we’d know that everything we perceive is just that – a perception. Feeling trapped and feeling free sit on two sides of the same coin. We have heard of the richest people – with several worlds at their feet – feeling trapped and suicidal; and then we’ve heard of monks being jailed for 20 years, never feeling like they’d lost any freedom. So freedom doesn’t have anything to do with where we are or what we’re doing. As cliche as it sounds, freedom really does just come from the mind.

But how?

Karma & Merits: Two Currencies that Keep Us Trapped or Make Us Free

Before we go further into looking at how to really break away from the traps we set ourselves, it is important to define two words: karma and merit. These words will be used frequently in the rest of this article and are two very pivotal terms.

Karma, loosely translated from Sanskrit, means “action”. It refers to the fact that every one of our actions, speech and thoughts – whether positive, negative or neutral has a corresponding reaction. This means that whatever we do now will ripen as a certain effect later in future (in this or in future lives). It creates certain effects and situations for us, but once that effect manifests, the karma is considered to be exhausted and no longer existent. Karma does not necessarily lead to anything good, nor to Enlightenment; nor does it have any specific correlation to whether we are on a spiritual path or not. Even people who are not spiritual or religious have, create and experience the effects of karma.

Merit is a type of positive potential, or energy, we create in altruistic actions, which supports and propels us forward in our spiritual journey. It continues to be generated for as long as we are engaged in spiritual actions and heading towards the supreme, ultimate goal of enlightenment. Merit is related specifically to our spiritual practice and work, and is particularly determined by the intention and motivation of our actions, speech and thoughts. (Spirituality in this case refers to any work or practice done with the altruistic intention that it creates results for the benefit of others). Merit leads us ultimately to Buddhahood, when it completes – at this stage, we no longer need to continue generating merits and our accumulation of karma also ceases.

While we are always creating both karma and merit, the difference between them lies principally in the motivation that drives our actions. Engaging in actions purely with the intention to benefit ourselves alone creates only karma – whether negative, positive or neutral. Engaging in actions with the intention to benefit others results in the creation of merit, which then leads us onwards in achieving the highest spiritual states of great compassion (Bodhicitta) and wisdom – Enlightenment.

Merit can be likened to a natural spring which never runs out – it is continuously replenished through the water cycle. Karma, on the other hand, is likened to a large cauldron of water, the quantity of which is finite. Merit, like water from the natural spring – can be extracted, but can be continuously and naturally regenerated and refilled as long as we continue to engage in positive, altruistic actions. Karma, like water from the cauldron, cannot be regenerated in the same way; once water is extracted from the cauldron, it will only begin to run down.

The Biggest Treasure Hunt of Our Lives

We didn’t really all start out feeling “trapped”. We felt pretty free when we were kids, didn’t we? Anything and everything goes when you’re six years old. Then we start going to school and the cycle begins – peer pressure, the need for good grades, approval from teachers and classmates, and that tricky social hierarchy found only in school cafeterias. We begin to discover the importance of reputation, the material success of good grades (and where it can lead you to), social acceptance, compliments and put-downs.

Around us, the world is moving up, that beautiful illusory parallel universe that exists in advertising tell us of all the wonderful things we should have, must have, can have! If only we had these things – our lives would be HAPPIER! We see our parents buying into the illusion. As we get older, our friends and colleagues at school and work are also starting to live that incredible dream that we see on television. In the post-modern world, the made-up playworld of the media tells us how things should be in reality. Our worlds become defined by a “system of objects” (Baudrillard) outside of ourselves, and our lives shape themselves around achieving this beautiful illusion.

So we chase – the perfect relationship (because couples always look so happy on television), the perfect house (because that billion-dollar property industry knows how to make gorgeous pamphlets of their latest development), money (because the Kardashians make life-with-wealth look so much more desirable). We spend our whole lives thinking, “If only I could get this, then all will be perfect. I will be happy. I will finally feel free.” We sign up for the big treasure hunt of our lives.

But ask anyone in this big hunt if they really are happy, if their lives really are perfect, if they could be sure that it would be like this forever. Most of them would probably say no. Things would be just that little bit better if they could get a better job, or a bigger house, or another child; if only their husband was a little less lazy, if only their wife was a little more understanding; if only they could adjust the size of their thighs or stop that balding patch from spreading. 

Before we know it, we’re 65 and we’re retiring, and we realize that in that pursuit of all the things we think will bring happiness and freedom, we have lost our entire lives. The very things we engaged in to free ourselves from this trap – money, relationship, family, career, fame and reputation – are the very things that have kept us from truly being free.

Satiating Cravings: How Illusions Reaffirm Our Delusions

As much as we’d like to pretend that we are completely independent free-thinking agents of our own will, the truth of the matter is that we are all acting from the same single central delusion of the world: craving. Everybody craves something – security, happiness, love, wealth, status, reputation, material things, protection, peace, children or a combination – and we operate entirely from this. The list is endless. Even people who seem to be unattached to material things operate from the “craving” to live a simple and uncomplicated life.

Then we have to find and do things to satisfy the craving. That’s where the influences of advertising, family, society, peers rear their ugly coiffeured heads – they create these beautiful illusions to buy into to satisfy that painful craving. The illusions paint the prettiest pictures we know – of brand new cars, of bigger houses, of happy couples and smiling families, of that life of ease acquired with lots of wealth. So off we go, we join that “system of objects” and act out those many illusions. We buy the car (or trade in our old one, for a better one), we buy a second house (even though we’re just fine with one), we search the ends of the world for The One that we will marry (because Bridget Jones told us it’s possible), we put ourselves through excruciating test-tube procedures to produce 2.5 beautiful, bouncing babies.

As we do so, we feel happy for a moment, the craving is satisfied. We reaffirm to ourselves that the cravings are real, they are important and that it is necessary to satiate them as best as we can. Cravings begin to take on a life of their own. Like a troll under the bridge, it starts to not be satisfied by the car anymore. It wants a fancier house, a bigger car, a more prestigious job or a second round of plastic surgery. After about six months, it decides that it doesn’t like this house anymore, it’s a little shoddy; it wants another house in a posher housing estate.

So we listen to the cravings, we ache from the want of these things and off we go looking for a way to quell the pain. Like a spoiled child, that ugly delusion of cravings stomps its feet and we run around in circles, finding flawless illusions to pacify it and keep it happy. As we chase after bigger, more exciting illusions, we reinforce the cravings, reaffirming within our minds that it’s okay to have these cravings and it’s okay to satiate them. Our sole purpose in life becomes about appeasing these cravings. What we fail to realize is that the spoiled child grows up and his demands get stronger, more challenging. So, like an anxious, fearful parent, we then run faster, spinning in tighter and tighter circles around the delusion. We feed it and it grows.

Antidote: The Power of Dharma Work for Cutting Through Illusions

While we might not be able to counter delusion directly, we can begin with the actions that arise from the reinforced delusions – the illusions. We begin first with cutting through illusions, not bending to their every whim.

Totally ignoring the lure of illusions is of course impossible. So what we can do instead, is distract them. Instead of filling our time with activities to strengthen our delusions, we divert our attention and energy towards activities that draw us away from the delusions. This is Dharma work – the very counter to our cravings, desires and attachments. As Dharma work focuses on achieving and creating things for others, it takes away from that deep-seated craving for ourselves which persists within us. Engaging in this kind of work, activity or practice takes time away from us going deeper and deeper into the trap of ourselves. The more time we spend on Dharma work, the less time we have for chasing those mirage-like illusions.

But then again, you might ask, what if Dharma was just another big illusion? Another distracted way for us to fulfill that ugly old delusion inside us called craving? What if Dharma was just another avenue for thinking about ourselves and all we wanted for that ego-centric “me me me” lurking inside our heads? Then how would that be any different from the high-powered job, the second house and the mortgage, the 12th boyfriend or the pay rise?

Well the thing is, it isn’t that different – and yes, we could very well be setting ourselves up to fall into yet another trap.

Antidote: The Power of Merits to Cut Through Delusion

We’ve found a way to cut through that clutter of illusion. Now, there’s the tougher menace of delusion – craving – to get through. With a tougher enemy, you’re going to need a much tougher weapon but with this in hand, you’ll be sure that any method you use will work. The concerns about Dharma work turning into a false method – another illusion – will also be resolved. Instead of trapping you further, your actions will turn your controlling delusions around into freedom.

Here’s how it works: you’re now engaging in Dharma work but you’re not quite sure whether it’s really actually getting to the root of the problem: your cravings. So here’s a good self-check to do: what is your motivation behind all the things you do? Is it for the benefit of others? Or just another manifestation of doing something for yourself? To satisfy concerns for own security, material gain, reputation, boredom? It is that very motivation that will determine whether you’re slaying that monstrous demon of selfish craving, or fattening it up.

Looking at this key point of motivation, we can come to understand that doing Dharma work solely with the wish to benefit ourselves leads only to the creation of karma which is, like the cauldron of water, exhaustible and rather meaningless. It doesn’t necessarily lead us to any ultimate improvement, happiness or freedom. Engaging in Dharma work with the wish to benefit others, however, leads to the creation of merit which is inexhaustible and which supports and drives us towards our spiritual goals – this results, eventually, in complete liberation, Enlightenment.

In the case of delusions therefore, the wish to benefit ourselves – creating karma – only serves to feed and further reinforce the cravings.

The wish to benefit others – creating merit – serves to lessen the cravings allowing it to eventually cease.

As we begin our practice, we may find that we still feel trapped, like we’ve just jumped from the frying pan into the fire. “What have I got myself into?!” We think to ourselves, “This isn’t any easier than how it was before spirituality.” This is only natural. We will still feel trapped because our cravings are still there, lurking in the corner and waiting to pounce. Doing the work and practice itself will not lessen the cravings. The negative thoughts and continued cravings that arise within Dharma may actually be creating more karma for ourselves. The crucial difference however, is that in Dharma, our actions are focused upon something higher – either our teachers or some kind of work and practice that seeks to benefit others in some form. In that, we at least stand a chance to develop merit so we can begin to work on cutting down the delusions. It’s a hard climb to the top of those attainments, but at least we put on the shoes and start putting one foot in front of the other.

It might also seem a daunting task to begin thinking of all sentient beings when we’re still grappling with our own individual wants, needs and desires. But we don’t have to start with the entire universe just yet. Shantideva has advised that we should start by thinking of the people closest to us first – our mothers, for example – and then expand it to include people within wider and wider circles. Eventually, it becomes natural to generate this altruistic motivation for all beings, even strangers.

Alternatively, we can generate a kind of superficial compassion for all sentient beings first. As we practice, we affirm this thought more strongly and it becomes more and more natural until we eventually begin to act naturally out of a genuine wish to help others.

Starting Out on the Right Foot: How to Set a Good Motivation

For as much as we mean well, we know the old adage that “the road to hell is paved with good intentions.” At our level, we can never really tell if what we are doing is beneficial, helpful or good in the long-term, at an ultimate level. While we blunder along believing (or trying to convince ourselves!) that our actions are totally pure, we could very well be doing more harm than good.

The only thing that can help us determine or change our motivation is by knowledge – by knowing what to focus on and understanding why. With knowledge, we will know what to do and what not to do; we’ll be able to counter doubt and answer questions clearly that arise in our own minds.

We gain that knowledge from someone who’s been there, done that and understands things from a much higher stand point than us – a Guru. This is a person who has himself stopped chasing illusions so that he could study, gain the knowledge, practice it and take vows so that he could teach it to us. This is a person who has understood the ultimate harm we inflict on ourselves (and others) by feeding the delusions and reinforcing it by our illusions – and who now directs every of his actions towards countering that. If there’s any example to live by, it would be our very own teachers.

The teacher himself has also received these teachings and body of knowledge from his teachers: and in turn, they learned from their teachers, leading all the way back to Buddha Shakyamuni. As we all know, Buddha completely cut through all illusions, destroyed all delusions and emerged free, at the highest level, to then teach us those same methods. We have that knowledge now in our hands – passed down pure and unsullied through the many generations of teachers to our own kind teacher, who then teaches it to us.

With this knowledge – and the thousands of years of it being tried and tested – we have that single key to unlock the correct, positive motivation in us that will make all the difference between creating further karma to chain us to our delusions, or creating merit to free us from them.

Armed with knowledge and motivation, we’re ready to fight that battle against illusions and delusions. But, like any warfare, how successful we will be will depend solely on how consistent and persistent we are in maintaining our practice and motivation. Just as water from a spring is continuously generated and flows onwards to provide us with water, so too does our merit need to be continuously generated to sustain and “provide” for our spiritual endeavors.

That “Ah Ha!” Moment: How Motivation and Merit Leads to Realization

Merit is also pivotal in helping us to gain realizations along our practice. It is important to note the significant difference between merely understanding something and realizing it, which is to actualize the teachings, internalize them and thus create transformation within our mind, attitude and focus. For example, there is a big difference in just intellectually understanding that a fire will burn us and realizing the truth of it when we put our hand into a fire and burn it. Upon realizing the effects, we make the resolution to amend our behavior and actions around fire henceforth.

In this case, gaining merit helps us not just as a means of distraction from our cravings. On a much more profound level, it helps us by creating conducive situations for us to receive knowledge (such as by meeting a teacher and being able to attend his teachings). Then, merit also helps us to understand the teachings – it is in a language we understand and we are of a sound enough mind and intellect to grasp the meaning. Most importantly, the merit we have helps us to internalize this knowledge and realize it.

When we realize the teachings, we experience mind transformation which thus pushes us further on our spiritual journey of mind development. With that, we begin to understand the workings of delusions, how we react (incorrectly) through the enactment of illusions and how we trap ourselves in this cycle. In other words, by the driving force of merit, we are able to learn, understand and internalize the causes and effects of delusions and illusions, and thus set the firm determination to renounce this cycle. Eventually – one realization at a time – we free ourselves from our self-imposed traps and are led to Enlightenment.

Discovering Treasure: The Relationship with the Teacher

Understanding that the teacher holds every precious bit of knowledge we need to generate the correct motivation and set us on the right path towards Enlightenment, we learn to hold him – and our relationship with him – supreme. To us, the teacher is all of Buddha, Dharma and Sangha, for it is through him that we are connected to the Buddha, we receive the Dharma and have a direct relationship with Sangha. It is through our teacher that we generate our own faith in the Three Jewels.

To us, the teacher is more precious, more important than the Buddha himself; we recognize that at this stage, we cannot perceive the Buddha directly and our Buddha statues cannot talk to us to give us teachings. Only our teacher can give us the Dharma. In this way, in the tantric path, we are taught to view our teacher as a Buddha and by that, we in turn receive the full blessings of a Buddha when we make offerings to him, practice the teachings he gives us and serve him well.

Because the power of the teacher is so strong, it help us to literally free ourselves from the vicious cycle of delusions and illusions; our actions and attitudes towards him therefore have a direct bearing on our spiritual practice. Should we regard and treat him as a Buddha, we receive the corresponding merit and benefit from a Buddha; if we regard him as just a friend, we receive that same level of benefit, etc. Actually, by the power of the object (the Lama) itself, doing anything positive and virtuous towards this will generate powerful merit for us even without us knowing.

The converse also applies. If we act in negative ways towards him or do not follow his instructions to us, we collect very negative karma that brings us further away from our spiritual practice. This is very logical. If doing something virtuous with a good altruistic thought towards a virtuous object creates the positive energy of merit, then doing the opposite – a negative action with unclean thoughts will also create karma leading to negative effects.

In this way, therefore, two people could be practicing and studying very near the same teacher, both doing the very same things, but one could be generating vast amounts of merit while the other may be creating plenty of negative karma. This will be determined solely by the motivation behind their service towards the teacher and how they engage in their Dharma practice around him. 

It is not uncommon for very close students to suddenly quit and run away from the Dharma, or for their behavior to worsen over time. This is not the fault of the teacher – who loves his students equally – but is attributed to the wrong motivations of the student. By his wrong motivation, he would have been creating karma, not merit. As the karma builds over time, it overwhelms the merit. Eventually, the merit “runs out” in the way that it is so greatly outweighed by this karma that it is no longer able to take effect to help one’s spiritual path. 

By that same token, it is also not uncommon to see students who are physically far away from the teacher but who experience very profound transformation and who become increasingly devoted and firm in their practice. This is because, with or without the physical proximity of their teacher, their motivation remains firmly on benefiting others so that whatever they do continuously generates the merit to support their practice.

Fighting the Urge: Escaping the Endless Vicious Cycle

It isn’t easy to get out of the trap we create for ourselves – the familiar feeling of those delusions feel good and the enactment of illusions fills us every moment with the anticipation of happier times. Applying the opposite, just as outlined here, may well seem the more difficult path. Engaging in spiritual practice, learning to think of others than ourselves and taking ourselves away from our physical pleasures may be tough, even painful.

But NOT doing it is worse.

Both ways – in Dharma and out of Dharma – will feel like a trap at first. But in recognizing the highest potential that merit can bring us, this practice and work puts us in good stead to at least find a way out of the maze. If nothing else, we would have helped more people than just our one solitary self along the way.

Perhaps, along the way, you might discover too a different sort of craving – a stronger but surprising addiction to making a change in the lives of others. To see someone happier because of you or in less pain, when you had expected nothing back from them, lights a magic fire in your heart. That is a happiness beyond you. And it isn’t even a passing illusion. It’s real. It’s someone standing in the flesh in front of you, alive and happy. That alone is worth shattering every illusion for.

Questions & Answers

Q: I have heard some people say that one’s merit can run out, and therefore they are not able to engage in any spiritual practice anymore. Is that true?

A: We might engage in spiritual practice or actions with the wish to benefit ourselves, to satisfy our egos, to look good or to get fame and position. We might also be doing it out of concern for one or two individuals we love. In this case, we would then be creating only karma, which is exhaustible. We may be engaging in actions in the name of Dharma but no merit is created because the motivation is not to benefit all beings. Instead of freeing us from our illusions, our spiritual actions actually just become yet another illusion to feed into the cravings in our mind.

It is not that our merit runs out, but rather the amount of karma that we create becomes overwhelming and far outweighs whatever small amount of merit we have. When this happens, the small amount of merit is not able to keep us going in our spiritual actions and practice, so we may be incited to leave or quit.

It is incorrect to say that one’s merits have run out and therefore, there is nothing one can do anymore. This is like saying that we are hungry and have run out of food, but we continue to just sit there and not do anything to get some food. Merit can be continuously generated in the actions we do and with the motivation that we carry. If we conscientiously engage in actions / motivations to create merit, this will thus also continuously sustain our spiritual practice.

Q: Give me an example to illustrate the workings of Karma and Merits

A: Due to the two types of motivation that can arise:

1. For the benefit of the self, which creates karma.
2. For the benefit of others, which creates merit.

An example to illustrate the workings and nature of karma is as follows: karma is similar to us scooping water from a cauldron and giving it to someone with the expectation of receiving something back. However, once the kindness is given and received, the karma ends. In this way, the cauldron will eventually run out of water as we keep taking water from it.

Merit is likened to us scooping water from a natural spring with its source of water coming from the mountains. No matter how much water we scoop out, the source is endless. The spring will therefore never run out of water. When we engage in actions purely to benefit all sentient beings without the element of self in the equation, we create powerful merits and not karma.

Q: I am engaging in Dharma practice for the sake of my partner, who I love very much. Do I collect merit or karma when I have this kind of motivation?

A: If you are doing Dharma for a partner, friend or family member, you create karma, rather than merit. This is because although you are doing Dharma for someone else, it is still ultimately for your own personal gain. If we were sincerely concerned for the welfare and benefit of others, we would be doing Dharma not just for one of our loved ones, but for many more beings.

Further, because the object of our practice is someone who is not “higher” than us – such as our Guru – we create karma rather than merit, for the motivation and focus are not for a larger good.

Q: How about if I switch my motivation to doing Dharma for my Guru instead of my partner?

A: In this case, your Dharma action – done in relation to your Guru – will accrue a mixture of both karma and merit. At some level, you are still acting out of a self-centered motivation, for your own benefit, which is where you generate karma. However, because the object itself – the Guru – is holy and exists entirely for the benefit of others, you will also still generate some merit by focusing on and serving him. Eventually, as you continue with this motivation focusing on your teacher, you can generate enough merit to expand motivation to encompass a wider scope of benefit.

Q: What happens if I quit or leave the Dharma, or if I break a promise to my spiritual teacher?

A: First, we must understand that when we engage in Dharma work or follow the instructions of the teacher, we are supporting a series of actions that will lead to the benefit of others. Whether it is an instruction to physically go out and do something for someone, or an instruction to enter retreat, the end result of Dharma should always be to bring benefit to others. Even entering solitary retreat is about improving our mind such that we develop the qualities necessary to be of more benefit and less harm to others.

When we give up on the Dharma or fail to carry out the instructions of the teacher, we directly cut ourselves off from being able to help someone, either directly or in the long term. All the people that we could have helped by our Dharma work would thus not be able to receive that help, or the help would be delayed. The negative karma of that effect on those beings would then come back to us.

It is incorrect to simply think that if we leave the Dharma, there is no effect, or that it is “good enough if we are good people” and are not harming someone. Often, inactivity alone is damaging and harmful – we collect the negative karma because we know better and could have done something to help someone, but we didn’t. For example, by following our lama’s instructions, we could have reached out to help 100 people. By not following the instructions, we may never be able to help any of those 100 people and they will continue to suffer. We may not have hurt them directly, but we allow them to continue suffering – doesn’t that amount to the same thing?

Q: What is samaya? What does it mean to break samaya and what is the effect?

A: Samaya is the spiritual bond, commitment and loyalty between a student and his Guru, or a student and his spiritual community (which could be either ordained or lay). To maintain good, clean samaya is to engage in Dharma practice exactly in accordance with our teacher’s instructions, with the belief and faith that everything the teacher advises us is for the higher benefit of ourselves and many other sentient beings. It is to keep our promises, uphold our words of honor and carry out instructions perfectly.

To break samaya is to go against our words of honor to our Guru or our spiritual community. It is when we are not honest, if we are deceptive or lie in any way, if we do not carry out the instructions of our teacher and do not practice what he has told us to, this collects a huge amount of negative karma because we directly contradict the Dharma teachings (truth) and go against what our holy teachers are telling us to do, which is only ever for the benefit of others. By not following through with the instructions, we are therefore allowing others to continue to suffer – imagine the corresponding karma that comes with that.

Also, while maintaining a pure samaya with our teachers and honoring our words towards him creates merit, it is only logical that doing the opposite creates a kind of demerit, or karma that prevents our positive merit from opening up. When we break samaya, it is like saying that we do not believe or accept the teachings and guidance from our Lama; that we know better. In this case, we create the karma to be separated from the Guru and not to be able to receive the teachings from the Guru in the future.

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